MARX BROTHERS

Marx Brothers' Christmas Special

2010-12-22T13:31:00.004+01:00

During the month of december, Bigdaddyat and myself decided that – for Christmas – we need to do something special. We have already invited Dainsanefh to our clan as an act of hospitality and reaching out to the impoverished, chanceless people on this planet. The fact that we made thousands of people happy by taking that smelly, long-haired and ill-mannered punk of the streets was rewarding, but we wanted something more positive as well.

That is why we decided that the Marx Brothers should, during the winter holidays, organize a show. Not just a show, a very special show: an ice skating show.

Early in December we started to do try-outs to see who could be participating in the show. Jimmykilcoo, eager as always, was the first who arrived at the – granted – rather small pool in Bigdaddyat’s backyard. His performance however was not exactly what we had in mind.

Hilarious. Absolutely. Marx Brother style. No doubt. Class? Hell no.

Airfix_9 didn’t fare a lot better. In fact, she never made it to try-out itself.

We wish you a speedy recovery, AF9. I hope the bruises do not hurt too much.

Dainsanefh proved that intelligence wasn’t one of the reasons why he joined the Marx Brothers:

In fact, when we finally got all of the other Marx Brothers on ice, the result wasn’t promising:

What we didn’t know at that time was that Anionic had other much more lofty commitments the day of the try-out. To be honest, our hopes of Anionic being any good at ice-skating were close to zero. He is a Brit. They hardly know what ice is as it just rains, rains, rains all day. It is never so cold that there is an ice layer where he can show off his “qualities”. (Mind you: you can’t blame him. Brits usually suck at Winter Olympics).

However, what we saw was impressive:

That is why we have decided to name our show ANI ON ICE!

For information about tickets, offers and other hilarious footage about the other skaters, please contact our sales manager Airfix_9.

Friendly Friday

2010-12-10T16:31:00.004+01:00

Ahh I love the smell of Friday and I think everyone does as well unless you happen to be in a sewer. If that is the case, I need you to get 4 baby turtles, some toxic waste,a box of pizza, and meet me in the alley located in Russia. You will be dropped a care package telling you more specific information when you get there. In the meantime, you can stay here and read the blog, which is sad only because my greatness has not touched the virtual pages in a while.

"...DragonStriker, DragonStriker, we missed your awesomeness. We are so glad you are here. You should definitely be the leader of the Power Soccer world." Aww that is very caring guys. I know I probably should, but rest assured that people are doing their best and I am just a small part in helping it stay awesome. As for this blog...Yeah it is just me being awesome.

In other news, since it is friday and I am sure many of you are in school, you must definitely look forward to Fridays. It signifies the start of freedom for until you must go back to having boring lives on Monday. Plus I know some of you have been taking exams and may finish this week so to you all I say congratz on making it through the week. To those about to take exams, I wish you all the best of luck. And to those not taking exams, but still have to fight through every week, I am glad you get some time to relax and enjoy being lazy like this couch potato.

In order to celebrate Friday and the coming of the weekend, I think everyone needs to have one of these. I say it is essential to having a good weekend and you should trust me because I'm a Doctor of pepper. The secret is a good laugh. Now you may not laugh at some things because everyone has a different sense of humor or no humor at all, but I hope you do get to laugh at something today like this.

This is DragonStriker saying, "Have a great Weekend everyone and come back now ya hear (in a crazy country voice)."

Happy Halloween

2010-11-01T02:57:00.002+01:00

Before we get to the topic at hand, there are things that must be cleared in the Agenda. You may have read in the post below that I stole the word "Tomfoolery" from Eindhatre. This is false and is a prime example of a ninnymuggin at work since we know the word was created before Eindhatre was born. Also, the soccer game noise was indeed annoying and I shall give 25 tokens to anyone who was annoyed by the sound and replace the sound with the sound of Vuvuzelas.

Yes as you can read (at least I hope you can) it is Halloween and me giving you 25 tokens was part of your trick for the day. This scary, delicious holiday lies on October 31, which marks the end of one month and the beginning of another, more tasty month. I hope all of you took the time to go outside and get free candy from everyone who bothered to buy some or answer their door with some. This is the only time where you can knock on someone's door and be given candy just for knocking on a door and saying "trick-or-treat" so you had better seize the moment now. I would love to know if anyone dressed up as something interesting or creative this year. It is always nice to see some people really take it to the extreme. Eindhatre_Marx decided to find a costume this year and the coolest thing is, it was free. "how come oh great one?" Yes, that is because Eindhatre decided to not put on a costume, which is scarier than any other costume you can think off.

Now, I presume that those of you that are older and feel too old to be knocking on people's doors for candy may have gone to a Halloween party. If that is the case, I hope you had a great time within reason. The night brings out some odd freaks. In fact, This man found a freak, but it was in the morning. Oh wait what am I saying? Of course I don't care about how your Halloween was. I hope you all got tricked and were scared out of your minds. Nahh, that was another trick, but unfortunately these people really got tricked.

Now that I have tricked you twice and given you one treat (guess what the treat is) It is time to make it equal by presenting you all with another treat to end the weekend. To a night, which is dedicated to witchs, ghouls, ghost, and all the creepy crawling things of the night, it would be sad if we didn't have zombies. Plus, nothing is more rewarding than getting to beat up zombies after they have been scaring you all night so enjoy getting your revenge by playing an awesome game without unwanted noise this time. If you can give me a print of your highscore, I may turn this into a competition and post your score picture for all to adore just as all adore me :D. So spin, jump, duck, and barrel roll your way through the hoard of zombies in this Zombie spree game.

For the last time until next year, HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!! *Poof*

This is DragonStriker saying, "hide your treats, hide yourself."

Word Of The Day

2010-10-28T00:53:00.004+02:00

Foreword:

The editors of this post would like to thank dragonstriker for two things:
a) the ridiculous kicking game (which I finished) that makes stupid sounds and makes me scroll down very fast to turn off the stupid sound - doesn't really complement "Advance Australia Fair", you know
b) of lesser importance, for stealing the previous Word Of The Day for his Own Evil Means. "tomfoolery" is my Word, you slimey so-and-so.

Main Body Argument:
It has once again come to my attention that Marx Brothers remains PowerSoccerLand's great moral influences on society all come down to our clan. Our non-selective, fair, unadulterated selection process allows any bastard into our clan. Thus, I come to a word which tastes so lovely in my mouth that I almost don't want to say it: Bastion.

Afterword:
We are the last moral bastion of PowerSoccer. Hurrah!

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Non Offensive Pic Of The Day

I never seem to get the gist of this section. I always seem to find extremely offensive snaps that are so offensive that they aren't offensive... the irony is delicious. God save the Queen!

So-offensive-it-is-non-offensive pic of the day

2010-10-16T23:53:00.005+02:00

I felt that this "oldie but a goodie" required its own post. Hopefully it will offend you so much it is non-offensive. Au revoir!

I bless the rains down in Africa...

2010-10-16T12:02:00.010+02:00

In the days leading up the canonisation of a wonderful Aussie, Mother Mary MacKillop (see right**) - some religious Aussie, no need to worry 'bout her - it seems the season of peace has not been extended to the vast majority of ladies and ladettes in PowerSoccerLand, with the fields and beaches being overrun not by pretty little girls, but by hoards of angry, fat, McDonalds-eating, baseball-watching, middle-aged, bald, illiterate Americanos. It is these people, if they deserve such a mundane or humane title, that are burning the fruits and hard yakka of PowerSoccereans such as your good selves. Spreading far and wide, Africa, currently undergoing the rain season, has become a nest for poachers, killing natives and taking them back to the native American homeland.

Recent developments in PowerSoccerLand have seen two of our most valuable members, me and yours truly, attempted to be poached by a unnamed clan (see relevant tag below) headed by an unnamed captain (again, see relevant tag below). This malicious entourage, however, easily succumbed to the trademark Marx Brotherian wit, resulting in a "i'm gonna have to close dis tab now" message (in fluent American) appearing in my chat. It is with deepest regrets that I declined the wonderful offer, even providing the rejected requestee with a perenial two fingered, PowerSoccerean salute to walk away with. With the poaching season almost over in Africa, and my recent discovery of the wonders of Asia#1, I hope that these marauding clans that hold malicious intentions towards our harmless clan seek and find new grounds for good breeding.

NEXT TIME ON MBTV: af9's visit to good ol' San Fran; sipwell's move into designer clothes; jimmykilcoo's first ever cup win and dain's nth cross-dressing attempt.

**Editing disclaimer: once again, it seems my sense of direction has gone AWOL. right=left in Aussieland.

Karate Choppin' through your computer screens

2010-10-13T04:33:00.004+02:00

Why hello there all you beautiful, yet incredibly lame people out there. Yes you are all beautiful, but lame as well because you all continue to ninnymuggins. Countless times I step on to the field with my theme music rolling, the crowd cheering, and the sun shining only on me. As my opponent comes out, the team is left in darkness and pit awaits them if they get a lead on me. As my players do what they normally do (be awesome), they dazzle people with their Pele-like bicycle kicks, Messi crosses, and simple gestures of satisfaction.

Then as I am busy performing all these tricks at my own expense without charging one shilling or crown (you can by airfix for 1 shilling now if you act fast), the opponent has the nerve to complain about how I am putting on a show. Soon like Eindhatre_marx's bad odor, the complaints come flying in and the only thing you want to do is knock them out or tase them for a brief second (or more) like these guys. Instead I have harnessed the power the great sage to deal with these panzies. It is called art of the screen chop. This is a sacred technique that can be mastered by one of the few greats like myself and is used as a last resort effort.

This technique allows me to hit the user through their computer screen causing them to be paralyzed until the match is over. So lesson to all you panzies out there, don't complain or don't face me at least.

Sidenote: Dragonstriker won the soccer game competition because he got the highest score so congratulations Dragonstriker. Here you are featured in a post.

This is DragonStriker saying, "Oh yeah I'm grown now. I'm really grown now."

News Flash Wednesday

2010-10-07T01:34:00.004+02:00

Ahhh it is the oddest part of the week. Why is it odd? Well that is because on Wednesday you are either completely tired and about to turn into a zombie since you have been working hard (harder than you normally do since some of you just sit all day) or you are completely energized like a bunny since you know the weekend is almost here. Whoever you may be, really isn't important to anyone so I don't know why you would let someone know. (Note: if you cried when I said that, I shall by you a pacifier to stop the tears).

In more important news, sometimes you play a match or a game and the opponent thinks they are better than you. They are using fast passes, long balls, smart crossing, fancy dribbles and you just can't handle it. You need to show them who is boss. Tell them they can't beat you because you are smarter than them. Be more like this young man.

In Unrelated news, times are getting hard. People are finding it harder and harder to get money. Now kids aren't able to pay for club membership and get cool stuff. You know what is the worst part though? Times are so bad that Mcdonalds is selling any size drinks for $1. As a under-payed citizen, I understand your pain and struggle. I understand how hard it is to afford to get coke for a dollar let alone tokens for power soccer. This is why I have devised a way for everyone to get free stuff. Displayed below:

Then you can sell the end product for tokens. I hope that connected with you all. (har har har)

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Non-Offensive Picture of the week

Now I think this is pretty non-offensive. I mean it is actually celebrating two sheeps coming together and accepting each other. However, I am sure one will ask, "why does the black sheep have some white and the white sheep have no black?" "Is the one sheep to good for the other?" "Why is one sheep's head over the other?" To you I say for shame because they just wanted to look like cookies n' cream.

This is DragonStriker saying, "Dragon Uuuup!!!"

Saturday Tomfoolery

2010-10-02T18:12:00.008+02:00

For others it may not be Saturday for you, which I am sorry. To those that today is Saturday, I am sorry as well. Why? Because my Saturday beats all of your days and that is all that counts. Unless you are talking about math teachers because they also count. Saturday is the day of tomfoolery.

*Question from the Audience* "What is tomfoolery DragonStriker?" Ah yes good question. Tomfoolery is foolish or senseless behavior. Usually every time Sipwell does something, or airfix decides to play a game, they are participating in tomfoolery and should be ignored on site. You should also report them to your local authorities so we can keep these people off the Power Soccer streets. If you want yet another example, please view this action of Tomfoolery as it shows you why being smart and civilized pays off. If you have anymore questions regarding this subject, please feel free to stop by my office. Class dismissed.

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Runaway Panzies of Power Soccer

Throughout my time on Power Soccer, I have come across many people who are very kind and love the game. They support the game by buying various items, supporting the hard work of the crew, and generally playing the game without complaints. However, there has been a slight rise in the panzies growing this season, which is odd because panzies shouldn't grow near winter season. You will get the people who ask, "why must I pay for a lame game when I can haz a cheezburger" or "I hate it when people dribble past my defender and score a goal." They then begin to display their hate on the wall of wailing and cry foul often like a famous Portugal soccer player we should all know and not understand. The panzies are then picked from the ground and run off to "better games" like "Dungeons and Dragons," "Pokemon," or "Fifa". I cry nay (because I am half man half horse) and have found a game that is home of the panzies. Now maybe the panzies can grow in a climate most suited for them. This game clearly has to be better than Power Soccer right? I mean the complexity is so intense (like a double rainbow flick) and you can always win or quit without worrying about your invisible rp. Yeah this has to be gold in the making right here. I even asked Kanye West what he thought about it and he said It's Amazing.

* Try to get a high score and send me a screenshot of it so you can be honored in a post challenge ends October 9th.*

Now run like the wind and go Play this soccer game so you may be featured in the greatest post of all.

This is DragonStriker saying, "If two wrongs don't make a right, what makes a left?"

I need a sandwich

2010-09-28T12:11:00.003+02:00

with the following ingredients:

1) brown bread with sesame on top;
2) cheddar cheese
3) salad
4) tomatoes (cut in quarters)
5) cuccumber (sliced in quarters)
6) mayonaise (not too much)

Wrapped in plastic foil.

Reward: eternal gratitude, respect and friendship.

Who is Bigdaddyat?

2010-09-24T20:49:00.007+02:00

I have been on Power Soccer for a long time. I've seen people go and come through those virtual doors. I have also seen many grow up to be great players (not greater than I of course). As I go about my day on PS being a complete BOSS and reading the forums with lot of people talking like This ninnymuggin, I can't help to ponder who Bigdaddyat is. A secret study has been done to observe this bigdaddyat while seeing who this person is and some interesting answers have appeared. This study was conducted by Harvard Grads so the results and study are 100% valid so you don't need to worry and question whether it is real or not. We know that some people on Power Soccer like to put pictures of themselves up (however ugly it may be) like Dainsanefh. Looking at Bigdaddyat's photo we see a turtle displayed in a superman stance with an M on his chest. They believe this might be his true identity, which many of you have probably seen already. He seems to be quite famous with the kids (maybe a need to alert the police). I have provided visual evidence for those who are unsure of his possible identity. This turtle does not have the letter 'M' (possibly standing for manzi panzi) posted on his chest, but he wears a lot of red, which is pretty close for our comparison. If you do not see this turtle lurking on the streets of Power Soccer, it is probably because he is in the sewers eating pizza and hiding from the world. Power Soccer is a pretty place and we can't have ugly mutant turtles ruining it you know, bad for business. However if he was like this turtle *bring in the awwww*, then he would be acceptable. Side note: If you said "awww" you are a panzy and should hide in The dungeon with other panzies until I say it is okay to come out and roam the grounds free from persecution. Trust me, it is for your own good. Now back to the study, the researchers were not okay with their first answer so they searched deeper into who bigdaddyat is and found out this creature called itself Jason. Immediately, they knew who it was. Displayed to your left, he was once known as the green, white and red ranger (Colors of the Italy and Mexico flags). No one knows why he left the power rangers after years of saving the earth in a pre-historic robo dinosaur, but they know he has moved to Power Soccer so he can be master of another megazord known as 'Power Soccer.' Unfortunately, the Grads were never able to confirm if this was his true identity, but at least now we are all able to put a face to a name. On the next installment, we ask why is this turtle/power ranger man is called bigdaddyat? Also, what is he a bigdaddyat? Is bigdaddyat the corner trying to sell jabulani shoes for a dirt cheap price or is he really a bigdaddyat pimping? Did this play on words fly by you like shots fly by your goalie? Only studies will tell.

Now a quick word from our sponsors. Read our blog, invite your friends because as DJ Khaled says WE DA BEST and we're always out here grindin.

This is DragonStriker saying, "Why take Dentyne Ice when you can have some fire in your life?" Stay toasty my friends.

Game of the Week

2010-09-20T17:51:00.009+02:00

Today's game of the week has more quality than Sipwell's posts and more popularity than a preteen girl's rating of Justin Bieber's micro sword (only you young Shakespearians will understand this or maybe those who have many lonely nights). Hope you enjoy it as much as Justin Bieber.

Disclaimer: We in no way hate Justin Bieber or his music. He is doing what he loves and making money, and we can only wish him the best in his career. He is a very good actor, comedian, and singer. since his music is a joke! Get it? haha But in all honesty, check out his latest song.

Make sure to say hi in the chat on the right side of the blog too so I can come by and say hi to you as well, write on your guestbook or do battle with you on the pitch haha.

So You Think You Can Win

2010-09-15T22:53:00.010+02:00

Well it's me Crono1231 again here with yet another post that's on the same day as my last post. How can I keep this up if I'm posting every 4 hours? Could I be turning into a spammer? :O

Well today's post will be rather short, but super HARD. Not quite this hard. But still fairly difficult. It's a small, fun contest that I would like all of you to participate in if you are bored, have the time, losing too much rp, or just want to achieve greatness in life.

The game is called "Untangle" and can be found by clicking here. What I want you to do is play the game and see if you can beat it.

Depending on how many people play the game or how difficult proves to be the selection of winners might change. However for now the rules will be that the first 10 people to complete the game will receive a shoutout on both this blog, my owners corner, and in the forum thread that I have created for this little contest. All you have to do is take a screen shot of you completing the game, and post a link to that screenshot in the forum thread. Please note that posting any other link that is very inappropriate or extremely unrelated to the game and uncool will be removed.

Go to imageshark or any other site you know of to upload your screenshot. This small little contest will run for a week (but two weeks if there are very few players), that means it will end September 29, 2010!! See you all then!

Bringing Sexy Back

2010-09-15T08:14:00.005+02:00

Hey everyone, welcome to the Marx Brothers Blog. If you are new here or simply just visiting the blog, I welcome you to the site and hope you will enjoy the things we here at Marx Brothers Inc. have to offer you.

Disclaimer: If you are looking for complaining, gossip, cruelty, or anything deemed incredibly horrible, you will not find it here (or at least not by me haha). If you are looking for small print though, you have found the right place.

Here at Marx Brothers, we strive to offer you the finest in blogging, whether it be our lives, experiences in Power Soccer, ridiculous things that happen among us, failures, and joys. Our mission is to bring sexy back in a way Justin Timberlake could never have brought it. If you are unaware of how Justin Timberlake proceeded to bring sexy back, you may view it here.

What we want to bring to you is something that just may be a little cooler than the forums you are used to. You won't find a single Jabulani here except our Jabulani wit that will blow over your head and leave you screaming, "bug!" I promise there are no bugs here though because we are well-equipped with Off! and Raid, so all bugs have been terminated. What you will find are some funny pictures, news, and maybe some videos of some pretty awesome stuff. Whatever it is, I hope that you will find it cool, funny, maybe a little stupid, but overall enjoyable.

Hopefully you will see this blog updated at least every 1-2 weeks (It's surprising we can't give you sooner releases with all the spammers here). But as you browse around, you can use the chat, watch some PS funny clips, comment on some blog posts if you would like, and talk to me on PS. I promise I won't eat you or anything. I'm not an animal. But speaking of animals, stay tuned for the next post where we will be looking at the origin of Sipwell: Human or Animal?

Crono1231, The Most Interesting Man In The World

Look At Your Skills, Now Look At Mine

2010-09-14T23:13:00.011+02:00

Sadly, they are not mine. But, if you would read the title and follow my previous sentence then you could follow the words coming out of my mouth and your skills could be like mine.

Look above, now look below.

The link is now diamonds because my skills are hardcore, sweet, a woman's best friend, and hard to break.

Before you leave this part of the page though, I would like to introduce myself. As many of you may or may not know, I am the user known as crono1231. It's funny because there really wasn't a way of you knowing who this was until I wrote it here so now you all know me. As far as Power Soccer goes, I mainly like to read and post in the forums, chat with people, and play a friendly here and there. As you can see, I am a brother.

Not a brother:

But a Brother:

But in all honesty I am in fact like that brother to the left (Yes, both of them). I'm awesome, smooth, and I'm always wielding deadly weapons like my mind and my heart (Look Mom No Deagle!). I'm currently in college working towards my major in Cognitive Science and Psychology with a minor in Biology. With all of this knowledge, I hope to go to Medical School and become a neurosurgeon, later working under Doctors Without Borders. They specialize in working in very poor countries and providing medical care to those that greatly need it.

As far as any talents, hobbies, etc., I can tell you that I enjoy playing saxophone,

and I am currently in the hunt for one. I also enjoy playing some basketball, mainly watching football, and somewhat owning in dodgeball. We usually play with wrenches, but they had suspended that equipment and switched to small, squishy balls for safety.

If I can help it, I try to avoid hits like these, but sometimes you just can't avoid them when you're really trying to hit that guy.

For now my deadly weapon is out of ammo, so I won't be able to feed any more bullets or information to you all, but I encourage you to come talk to me sometime when I'm online if you just want to say hi, maybe have a life problem, or just really want to talk. It's a pleasure to be in the PS community, a brother, and most importantly be able to give you just a bit of insight on what a brother likes to do in his life. For those who have made it this far down, I leave you with this.

Enjoy your day everyone!

-Crono1231, Ask your doctor before trying. Warning: May Cause Drowsiness or Loss of Words.

The Invasi..... Expansion is Upon Us!!!

2010-09-03T17:49:00.014+02:00

Well, despite our greatest efforts to wait until we were all wholly inactive, thus letting this great clan drift into the annals (perhaps in our case that should only have 1 "n", but we'll go with it) of history forever, some poor saps among us have seen fit to actually add a new member or 2. It is my great displeasure, having drawn the shortest twiglet, to present to you our newest 2 members:

Rabidgoolie
Despite being unable to actually spell his own username, this delightful chump from the vast expanses of Northern Canada brings to the table a keen sense of dry wittiness. I think the continual open fire in his igloo has dried his brain... This lad has long been a god fit for all that is Marxian, yet has seen fit to stay (unfittingly) in a clan alone with our other new member. Finally, they have gotten off their asses (seriously, they rode a strange looking pair of donkeys here) to become an active part of what we like to call the greatest mediocrity in PowerSoccerland.

Few may know of our friend's origins, he comes from so far north in Canada that even Jimmy does not consider it to be the same country. His upbringing included vast amounts of ice fishing, whale harpooning, dog sled racing, and of course, Eskimo Pies. In the end, he settled on what was his only true love, fencing. Sadly, he did not find himself skilled enough, and he suffered many knee injuries, which left him fighting in a much less hotly contested circuit (see right).

Embarrassed by having to fight old ladies, Rabid decided to move to a different level of fencing, but even he found that one to be even more embarrassing than the first one...and, dare I say it, a tad bit gay.

Having realized that his username was mispelled from the start, he decided to change the 1st part of his name to open another avenue for him. Everyone welcome our new friend and his new persona, "Rabbitgoolie"!

Dainsanefh
Our next new member comes to us from the 'hoods of L.A. He is a renowned musician (in his own mind) and generally a pain in the ass, therefore, he will fit in nicely. His over-inflated ego leaves him to think he is more important and useful than he really is, and even more so feeds his arrogance as a true ass. We always knew MB was the perfect place for him...

A bit of a retrospective on Dain's career to date. He began as a musician a few weeks ago, playing in his mother's basement (as so many do). The neighbors could not stand the screaming, nor the music, so he decided it best to take his show on the road. He borrowed some clothes from his mom, and started a band (right). The Neon Ninnies were only together for a short while, as they all thought the others looked to gay to be in the band, so they broke up (isn't it sad when everyone is actually right, but is too blind to see it?).

With that overtly homosexual experience behind him, Dain thought he would create the personas for the next musical group himself, and make them much more macho. As such, he figured the best place to start was by repeatedly listening to Macho Man and watching Village People videos. With that preparation behind him, he began to create the dream band The Fruity Boys (left). This "adventure" ended in disaster, when it became the tradition of their fans to throw fruit at the band while performing on stage. Dain wound up with an apple in the face, while one of the other members ended up with a banana stuck unsuitable content censored.

Dain too decided to make a change to his area of main focus, and pursue rubber bands instead. To this day, he is the keeper of the largest single man owned rubber band ball in all of California. People flock from blocks around to gawk at the sheer size of his rubber band ball (that and he still wears his first band costume all the time to remember the fond memories).

Unfortunately, when he grows bored, Dain has also undertaken finding new uses for his rubber bands. His latest idea is the anti-ugly fat face compression system. He has been working for months to perfect this system on himself, but with sadly dismal results.

Sadly, the results of aging and meager activity have allowed the sands of time to add a few inches to his belt line. As a blessing in disguise, Dain has found another possible use for his rubber bands. He is currently seeking investors, and welcomes all inquiries. He is in great hopes that if he just keeps trying, he will make it one day.

He will forever remember his glory days fondly, and even today wears a t-shirt hoping to capitalize on the vast quantities of groupies that exist in today's music industry.

At any rate, welcome to the "in crowd" gents. Twiglets are on the table, you may now partake.

Singing Mary Poppins?!?

2010-05-27T19:52:00.003+02:00

I should have known that this marriage was a lousy idea. It all started off wrong. A lonely woman in her late thirties, hungry to be somebody, quite literally begged me to become her spouse. She would have gone to the moon and back just to convince me as she knew that she would not stand a chance with a human: she had become an expert in rejection and failure in love.
I must say she had a rather decent wedding party: a rather extensive meadow for me alone, the promise of a plastered room of my own with running water and a bidet (a luxury for someone like me), a staggering WiFi system allowing me to be online in the furthest part of my rather swell personal grounds (it had a pond, some tiny rock hills and a number of small trees easy to climb) and the obligation to only meet her for social events as she was just keen to keep up appearances.

But then the masks fell off. She nagged incessantly to have walks or sit in the garden with milk-infested tea, forcefully introduced me to a seemingly endless number of her friends, annoying spinsters with a fetish for cuddle animals of one particular kind, sheep. Adding insult to injury, the pond was nothing more than a swamp with probably more bugs than in all of Florida. It turns out that she took me to the place of a befriended witch, who had a knack for ducks (and a pond full of them).
Worst of all though, I underestimated the hardship of living in the land of Englanders. Picture a country where slamming doors in one's face is a national tradition, where greeting is done by slapping each other on the face (ring inside, the only proper advantage of being married) and where your social status is based on your level of rudeness. As a culturally evolved animal, these are shocking moments, only to be forgotten with some imported booze, since local alcohol tasted like it came directly from the sewers.

Forgive me this vitriol. Some of it might be an exaggeration of sorts. Christine was sympathetic at times, able to find tasty grass for lunch and had hilarious moments which brought tears to my eyes. Some of her friends were simple yet friendly souls, who would stroke my hair or polish my horns whenever they paid a social call. Not all of the walks were bores as well: there were some moments when I felt Jane Austen's breath in my slim neck, taking notes for her next novel.

The reason for this angriness is related to the fact that less than a month after our 'marriage', I am terribly sick. The incompetent veterinarian diagnosed me with mononucleosis ( I had the blood results re-tested by an intelligent compatriot of mine), a disease I could only have inherited from her (since she is the only living creature who 'kissed' me on the cheeks). Feeling feverish, tired and thirsty all the time is not amusing, I can tell as of now. But don't despair: I am gathering all my germs, viruses and all other bacterial criminal I can locate in my body to strike back. She will be ill as if she paid a visit to Lucifer himself. But it is fully deserved!

Non-offensive picture of the day
A cloud above the sea, just transporting water to a place in dire need of it.

No Surprise!

2010-05-17T17:19:00.008+02:00

Well, having seen how swimmingly things had gone in the initial meeting between our lady and our goatixer, who could be surprised at the next bit of new to come from Marxville....

Yes, Christine and Sipwell have decided to make it official, and get married! Who can blame them, after all the useless banter, petty back-and-forths, and blatant useless squabbles, surely they were a perfect couple.

To start the big day, Sipwell got dressed up to look his very best. It seems he just wanted some extra frilly fabric to munch on later...

Notice how he meticulously combed his fur, and has that longing look in his eye as he gazes out upon his soon-to-be Mrs.

Christine also got all dressed up, and Sipwell would not be disappointed...

All in all, it was a match made in heaven. These two will be sure to make interesting little ones in the future. I for one was disappointed not to see Christine don the traditional wedding mustache, as it would have just completed the whole experience...

Not to be forgotten, the cake was a thing of sheer beauty:

The happy couple will be honeymooning in various fields and pastures scattered between London and Brussels. Travels to pastures as far as Hamburg have been rumored as well, but we have been unable to confirm at press time...

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Non-Offensive Pic

The 5-4-1

Although, as has become common lately, many PS users will surely find this offensive anyhow, despite it's obvious intentions to be anything but offensive....

A Smashing Success!

2010-05-14T15:47:00.005+02:00

The initial meeting between Christine and Sipwell went well, "beyond anyone's expectations", said Christine. The goatixer also replied in his typical spammy way, "baaa ba baaaaa baaa ba baa!" Clearly, he too enjoyed the meeting, and who could blame him?

It seems Christine not only took an immediate liking to the uniqueness of the goatixer crossbreed, but it also seems she is a bit "easy", if you get my meaning. The two frolicked and rolled in the meadow together, and it is rumoured that they even shared a room.... My how quickly things have progressed!!!

We were unable (and frankly not all too interested) to get pictures of the activities after they retired to their room, but we have a few shots of the obvious connection which they shared in their daily trysts in the meadow.

Truly a match made in heaven! (or was it Hamburg....)

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Obligatory Non-Offensive Pic of the Day

On closer inspection, I think the separation of the Whites and the Coloreds is clearly racist....damn me...

Help me!!

2010-05-12T10:06:00.002+02:00

Help Me!!

I think there is a problem with me and my rp - it keeps going up! It has gone up by a hundred in less then a week! I fear that if it keeps going like this, I may end up like one of those users addicted to rps, turned out by their families and living on the street.

If you look at my previous matches, I have lost only 4 of my last 25! No matter how hard I try to lose, and beg people to beat me, I keep winning. I can only think it is the evil curse of SURREAL, the evil clan which is now trying to kill MB and everything they stand for - losing and losing!

As you may know, some time last year I posted on this blog "How Good I really am" in which I showed you an invite to join the clan Alexander the Great (yes join, not apply) which was undoubtedly a evil plot from SURREAL to blackmail ATG to get me (here it is)

Uploaded with ImageShack.us

Please, somebody, anybody - beat me!

the Time Has Finally Come!!

2010-05-11T16:56:00.008+02:00

As many of you may have heard, Sheepwell and Christine are set to finally bring their, up 'til now, exclusively online relationship to a climax. Yes, they are set to meet, finally, somewhere in the Belgian countryside. The hopes and dreams of both are exceedingly high, and the hearts of the world are watching this touching story of true love via online soccer game. All are living the dream that this can truly work for them, and restore the faith in all humanity that love truly conquers all.

So it is, that bright and early this morning, our dear friend Christine has departed merry old England, on a lover's voyage through the Chunnel, and into France (a necessary evil to reach her love in Belgium). After a brief passage through Condom, in the farther reaches of France (perhaps she had better do some shopping there before her rendezvous...), she will pass into Belgium, and on to the magnificent home of Sir Sheep, and possessor of the "world's cutest little sheepish grin," according to Mrs. AF9.

At last, she will find his street, and sally forth with extreme giddiness in her heart. She will knock on the gate to his holding pen, and will clutch him tight to her bosom. He will baaaaa like only a sheep in the clutches of a beautiful mustached woman who is the love of his life can, and indeed, many a tear will surely be shed.

What will the future hold? Love? Lust? Will the famed goatixer of Belgium procreate with the bearded lady of Brittania? I guess we will have to wait for a bit to find out the true story...but in my mind, I imagine that it will begin somewhat like this:

Okay, perhaps I really am hoping for no more updates to this story....

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Non-offensive Pic of the Day

Strangely, I find the torture of that baby panda a wee bit offensive, no matter how cute it is....

New Initiative

2010-05-03T15:05:00.004+02:00

The Marx Brothers have been slowly planning our next move to better life in Powersoccerland. Following the recent developments we have seen accross the landscape, we have concluded that PSland is being threatened in a new, insidious, yet passively dangerous way...we are being threatened by the impending takeover bid of the beautiful, yet annoying pansy. These pansies seem to gather in large numbers, and act in concert with each other to overtake all else on the landscape. As such, we are launching a plan that, if successful, will result in the dramatic decrease of the very pansies which threaten our existence. Luckily, we here on Mt. Marx have been deemed as likely safe from this epidemic, and the pansies are unable to climb our rocky perimeter walls. However, we are not ones to be insulated from the plight of our fellow PowerSoccerites, and as such, we stand ready to help (as always).

Our plan is simple, we are unleashing a genetically engineered, overly-sized, and excessively ravenous species of aphids (pictured at right) into PowerSoccerland. Fear not friends, these aphids will not harm you in any way (unless your survival is dependant upon a garden of lettuce outside your window), but they are rather aggressive eaters of the common pansy. It is our hope that these exceptionally hungry and large aphids will devour the vast majority of the pansies in the countryside, leaving us space (and freedom) to go back to enjoying our daily lives.

If you are concerned about this impending release of our "super aphids" into PowerSoccerland, may I suggest to you some educational material in regrds to aphids....

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So in conclusion, our "non-offensive" Pic'O'the Day

The Lover Asks Forgiveness Because of His Many Moods

2010-05-01T22:06:00.000+02:00

If this importunate heart trouble your peace
With words lighter than air,
Or hopes that in mere hoping flicker and cease;
Crumple the rose in your hair;
And cover your lips with odorous twilight and say,
"O Hearts of wind-blown flame!
O Winds, older than changing of night and day,
That murmuring and longing came
From marble cities loud with tabors of old
In dove-grey faery lands;
From battle-banners, fold upon purple fold,
Queens wrought with glimmering hands;
That saw young Niamh hover with love-lorn face
Above the wandering tide;
And lingered in the hidden desolate place
Where the last Phoenix died,
And wrapped the flames above his holy head;
And still murmur and long:
O piteous Hearts, changing till change be dead
In a tumultuous song':
And cover the pale blossoms of your breast
With your dim heavy hair,
And trouble with a sigh for all things longing for rest
The odorous twilight there.

William Butler Yeats

Powersoccer: Irony-Free Zone

2010-04-29T18:58:00.003+02:00

We have recently discovered that nobody can take a joke. No matter - we were making these jokes for our own benefit anyway. We really don't give a damn about you.

But enough about Marx Brothers, our self-indulgence and self-love (furious, sweating, self-love - why do you think i play PS using the mouse? keeps the other hand free...), we are pleased to announce our new direction: to keep this blog as inoffensive, insipid, and boring as possible. Kind of like the PowerSoccer General Discussion forum that incidentally, despite repeated requests, I will never, EVER agree to moderate. We will endeavour to bring you discussion topics here that are nearly as ridiculous as "Who has the best username?", "How do I become an admin?", "COMMENT ON MY HIGHLIGHTS PLZZZZ" and my personal favourite, "Bring back the old version!"

I would like to present to you our new mascot AND theme song in one incredibly lame package. Hopefully this is beige enough for even the most hyper-sensitive palates:

Feast your eyes, ye wankers, and enjoy!

~jimmykilcoo

P.S. The only thing sadder than someone reporting this whole stupid business to the crew, is that the crew took it seriously. Disgraceful.

P.P.S. COME ON, FULHAM!

The Horizon

2010-04-29T16:20:00.011+02:00

From high atop Mt. Marx, we scan the horizon daily looking for those most worthy of inclusion in our highly esteemed (or maybe that should currently read "steamed") brotherhood of wit and chicanery. Alas, in our recent searches, we have not been so successful in locating the right type of individuals. We are seeking an individual with the mettle to withstand the attacks from all directions that we can sometimes invoke, while still maintaining their sense of self-depracating wit (and aye, still doing their admin tasks as well....).

You see, recently, as we look out over PowerSoccerland, indeed in all directions, this is what we see:

As we look out from our North Tower, the first thing to catch our eye is this, an expansive field of pansies. As you can see, this field of pansies has many different pansies in it's make-up, yet not 1 single pansy is able to stand out among all the other pansies. Indeed, each and every pansy is equally "pansy-like", and unable to overcome its obvious pansiness.

After the long climb up the Eastern Tower (the tallest on Mt. Marx), we look to the East, and find this lovely Japanese style garden full of pansies. No luck here either. Although the divine layout of the pansies here is quite aethstetically pleasing (mental note, create a similarly beautiful garden in Marx Meadow, perhaps near the lake).

Heading over to the South tower, we gaze off towards the warmer climates in the hopes of finding a happy-go-lucky candidate for potential inclusion within our ranks. Unfortunately, we find a vast expanse of...pansies. Sadly, these pansies are clearly racists (as you can tell by their singular color, and their obviously intentional failure to include pansies of any other color, quite offensive in my opinion). The last thing we need to add to our clan is a bunch of racists, so we decide we will not consider any from this area for inclusion either.

With dreadfully lowered expectations, we make the long trek to our Western facing tower. Surely the West is a source of self-loathing humor unlike anywhere else (afterall, the US, Canada, and Mexico lie there, what could be easier to laugh at?). Much to our dismay, all we find to the West is...you guessed it...a bunch of pansies. Nothing but pansies as far as the eye can see. At least here there is one pansy who has managed to make themselves a bit more noteworthy than the other, non-descript, pansies. It has become a model pansy for all pansies, rising above the others to bask in all its grand pansiness.

So, our search is becoming futile it seems, but we will not be disheartened. We will search on!

On another note, due to a new Marxian mandate, we will atempt to become more "pansy friendly" (largely due to the current landscape we find ourselves surrounded by) by ending each post with something that is in no way, shape, or form, able to be misconstrued as offensive or racist. I have chosen this item for today:

Some cute kittens frolicking on a sheet, and how fitting, the sheet is a pattern of a field of pansies!

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As an aside, we have created a stunning new shirt design, sure to become a fashion trend PowerSoccerland-wide. You can be sure to spot our members out and about, as they will likely be sporting this bold new design.Given enough demand, we may be persuaded to make this design available for sale to the community at-large.

Taking Things Personally

2010-04-29T04:50:00.002+02:00

The following is meant in a philosophical, general way. Recent events in Power Soccer have sparked anger in many people, and perhaps understandably so. However, all turmoil could easily have been avoided by following a simple, guiding principle in life. Don't take things personally. Likelihood has it, your enemy has no true meaning behind what he is saying. And thus, I present a quote I've created, since all quotes must be said by somebody.

"When man throws a pebble at you, it's the dumb that act, for they will soon be stoned. When man throws a stone at you, it's the dumb that stand still, for they will soon be stoned."

The intention, that one must recognize what is worthy of being fretted over, before one blows things entirely out of proportion and ends up worse off than just waking away.

However, one must be careful, for it can be easy to mistake a pebble for a stone, and if you are unsure, chance dictates it's a pebble.

Pebbles:

Stones:

Few insults in life are really meant, few actions are rarely designed to hurt the victim. But if a man pulls a knife on you, don't stand there and let him slice you up. Run the hell away. If he throws a verbal insult at you, it's nothing. On the net, much tends to be the later.

Do not overreact, and the world goes on with less ston(e?)ings (however you spell that).

Bigoted? Us? Pfffffffff!

2010-04-29T00:52:00.009+02:00

It has been mentioned recently that we may be a little guilty of being narrow-minded and, well, we've even been accused of racism. Now, I struggle to see what all of the fuss is about but then I am just a mere woman without the proper levels of intellect to understand the ramifications of the impact that our actions have on others perhaps less fortunate than ourselves.

Frankly, that was such a long sentence, I may have to lie down now or do some knitting or something.

It would appear that the problems stem from our desire to pick at people and make fun of them and, whilst I accept that having your leg pulled can cause feelings best described as "uncomfortable", it is who we are and we are unlikely to change. I do think that our more discerning audience members demand a bit more fun on this blog, not less, and who am I to fly in the face of this desire? Not me, I am but a humble vessel.

So, I've been having a bit of fun with Photoshop. The idea is to show you how we can treat an image that we just happen to stumble over on our travels through the wild and wacky web when "fun" is the order of the day. So, let's pick a photograph of a human being at random. Let's pick this one:~

There is a picture that is crying out for some fun... two random guys at a bar (which seems to sell tomato sauce in jars, by the look of it). We could turn one of our subjects into an Afghan:~

That's OK, I guess but how about making him completely black?

Fun, eh?

How about going the other way, and making him more white?

Or even dressing him up in a silly costume...

Or a (frankly) quite stupid one...

We could even make him religious:~

Or give him what he is desperately crying out for!

Now, I don't profess to be great at Photoshop but one thing is for certain, my brothers, sisters and I will continue to bring you our own brand of fun for a while yet. And, if you don't like it.... well, see that X symbol up to the right of this page? Click it!

We are not bigoted. We poke fun at people. Sometimes with spoons. We won't change and no-one is safe. Want some final proof? Sure, no problem!

The End of an Era

2010-04-28T18:22:00.006+02:00

Indeed, somethings in our lives are pure whimsy, others require painstaking devotion. One of these things that requires a great commitment, is the growth and maintenance of a truly good-looking beard. It is such a time consuming activity, that it can truly be classified as it's own era, if done properly. Our dear friend Michaelblake had that (yes, you read that correctly friends, had). I regret to be the one to inform you all here, today, that the beard is indeed dead...a moment of silence please.

Michaelblake came to the only possible conclusion over the last few days, that he was unable to make another similarly large commitment, the one that it would take to become a Marx Brother, and, realizing that resistance was futile, he determined the best course of action was to remove the one thing he thought we wanted, yes, the beard. Indeed, after an intense struggle, and several scissor re-sharpenings, at 8:23pm Central time, the beard was indeed pronounced trimmed. Friends and family gathered to wax nostalgic about the time they had each spent with the beard, as well as tell a few touching stories of their fondest memories in its presence.

Michaelblake's MAs recalled the time he mistakenly banned the wrong user, because the beard clicked the mouse button at an unfortunate moment. Others recalled the times the beard would dial them in the middle of the night, while Michaelblake was sleeping. Plnxty and his fellow Ireland clan mates shared a tory of how the beard accidentally dunked itself in Michaelblake's pint of Guinness during one of their Ireland clan gatherings (who could blame it afterall?, Guinness is good!). The somber gathering ended with a haunting tune, amidst the dead silence of those gathered.

So, it is with great saddness that Marx Brothers has ended our quest to bring the beard here at all costs. To that end, we still love Michaelblake and the beard, but in separate but different ways. Surely we can all understand Mr. Blake's predicament, as we have all wrestled with our destiny to join MB prior to being brought home, just few of us have gone to such drastic measures. We still welcome Michael home if and when he realizes his destiny is out of his own hands.

On a brighter note, we have procured the famed beard itself for inclusion in the Museum of Marx, atop the Mount (cost $1,427.36 USD, via Ebay) and offer all one final chance to pay their last respects.

2002-2010

The origin of the acronym MB

2010-04-28T10:48:00.000+02:00

I was long doubting whether I would write this blog post. It will be pathbreaking and shocking for some, as it involves me, Airfix_9, michaelblake and MB.

I need to take you back to the origin of the “Marx Brothers”. When Airfix_9 and myself looked for a name for this clan, we had a lot of difficulties. It could not be too corny, it could not be too intellectual, it could not be too boring. If you look at the name of many of the clans out there, they are just that. Anybody ever cared to know what TVST stands for? No, indeed. Keep it that way. The second difficulty – and here comes the shocker, part one – was that it had to be based on the acronym MB.
You see, Airfix_9 and me have the ability to look in the future. Granted, we have many deficiencies (being smart, cute, interesting to be around, funny, …) but we both have the magical gift of being able what will happen in the future. That is also why Airfix_9 hasn’t blogged so far, because she knows that michaelblake will join at one point. We created this clan especially for Michael Blake (MB!). He is our Saviour and we are his following (it is similar to the story of Jesus Christ, who equally had a beard. JC didn’t want to create a new religion, he wanted to revive the Jewish faith by taking it back to its core. It were only his Apostles and the many believers who created the church.) So, in essence, we always KNEW Michaelblake was joining powersoccer and we always knew he would join Marx Brothers. We also knew that he was our Saviour. And that is why we created a clan with the acronym MB and build our “church” around our Saviour, Michael Blake.

At the same time, we told our clan brothers at their introduction into MB that one day our Saviour will come and he will be recognizable by a beard. That is why our clan brothers were on the lookout for the best beard out there and all roads let to Michaelblake, All Saviours come with beards. You have to admit that growing a beard is a lot of work. You have to comb it. You have to keep it perky all the time in order not to scare women away. You have to balance it right in order not to look like a Taliban warrior or worse, George Clooney. In other words, you don’t grow a beard for your pleasure. That is also why Michaelblake HAS a beard. It is not because he likes it, it is not because Mrs. Blake likes it. There were secret forces in his head pushing for beard grow. It was like he was compelled to do this for a greater good. And all the pieces of the puzzle know fit neatly. Michaelblake, Saviour, we worship you.

Michaelblake for diplomat

2010-04-27T11:36:00.005+02:00

This is a post partially directed at Mister President Obama. You should hire Michaelblake at once as a top diplomat. Not only does he have a good working relations with Irishmen – a somewhat overlooked faction in your presidential cabinet – he equally has the skills to say nothing and a lot at the same time, which is a crucial asset for a diplomat.
Yesterday he approached me to have a talk. It must have been the first time we actually had a proper conversation, much to his pleasure.
QUOTE: 19:00:24 [Chat Admin] michaelblake: this chat is better than the many chats I have than the kids crying about the game all the time

What struck me in our conversation was that michaelblake was stating his candidacy for membership of this clan without actually formulating it that way. In fact, he said he did NOT want to become part of our clan. That begs the question: how on earth does he think we want him in our clan? Has there been any indication that we think michaelblake is a suitable MB candidate? Strategically speaking, that was both a wise and a bold move. He said nothing and everything at the same time, leaving all of MB flabbergasted.

He is a true hero, Michaelblake. And we all know where true heroes belong.

Look how perky that beard is. The boys from ZZ TOP are INFANTS if you look at the class and genius of this beard.

Nowhere to Hide

2010-04-26T23:50:00.003+02:00

We've got our intelligence reports, as our best agent Christine has taken a crucial, revealing photograph.

You'll be shocked by the following photo!

That's correct, that is him. He's so scared of our persuasive powers Michael Blake has taken to hiding in the Mourne Mountains. Sadly for him, we've found his pathetic hide out. We've got eyes in the sand, we've got eyes in the sky, we've got eyes in the mountains, we know where you are.

MB Racists?

2010-04-26T20:15:00.004+02:00

In a recent conversation, it seems our new friend, one MichaelBlake, is concerned about our recent "racist" attacks. As you can see below, he is concerned we are targeting some groups, while leaving others to feel left out somehow. (Please note some names/info has been blocked out to protect the whiny...)

As always, we endeavor to be fair, and as such, we post the following picture...

I think that should about cover it...

But seriously, how could we make fun of muslims...these guys can grow some fantastic beards!

Just look at them!

On another note, we have just received word on how Mr.Beard's beard is truly so full and wonderful....

As usual folks, you now know the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth....

Our Newest cross Breed

2010-04-26T19:56:00.003+02:00

Well, there has ben some chatter in the clan forums about cow2011 and soccerduke loving each other, indeed, I found these top secret private pics:

Here, we can see the two of them canoodling quite cozily. Aren't they cute?

Also, we have found photos of their "love children" as well:

Was there ever any doubt? Please discuss....

Lead us to safe waters, o Captain!

2010-04-26T10:27:00.002+02:00

For those of you unaware of anything but their own little issues, the Belgian government is on the brink of falling yet again. This must have been the 5th time in 3 years time. Belgians are good at having a failed government and are even better at organizing expensive elections every two years. As Belgium has a duty to vote, everybody loses its free Sunday and have you imagined all the paper that is used?
Anyways, what Belgium would need is a steady ship. A long period of non-falling governments. Somebody who can captain the ship for quite a long time. Reflecting back on history, I have noticed that only one man succeeded in having a 40 years reign without one single government falling (granted, he was not a prime minister yet he had to accept the demission of a government, and he never did so they worked on). I am talking about King Leopold II. And look what his greatest asset was:

I have the impression that Marx Brothers is also an unsteady bunch at the moment. So we need a captain. Who else can it be then:

Lead us to safe waters, o Captain!

Michael Blake We Don't Want You

2010-04-25T22:35:00.002+02:00

As regular psychology has failed to work its magic, I have decided to turn to reverse psychology, beware its potential (or don't).

You are as wanted in Marx Brothers as jimmy, you are as needed as a sheep. We don't give a seconds thought to your existence, in fact, do you exist? When I trample on a flower, I say, let's give this to Michael Blake in it's trampled glory. You're as kind as a wet dog who just got beat up by a mouse, as desired as the Prime Minister position in England.

When I step on a bug, I say to myself if a man came up to me with the proposition, eat it or force Blake Michael into the Marx Brothers, I'd pick to eat the man. When choosing a toilet paper I dwell on how I'd rather go Japanese then get the beard in our glorified clan. Your not so amazing chat adminship like skills make me want to puke, to think of being stuck with it. I'd rather be thrown in a trash dump with lenar then sit in the same room as that bloke jailed in that Ireland clan thingy that planxy ran.

Look at the man, who would want him in their clan?

Why must you be so close as Ireland? Why not Antarctica?

Irish Have Terrible Beards...

2010-04-22T14:08:00.004+02:00

We have just received further proof that the Irish should not have beards:

Now, having seen this you must ask yourself. Should one with an already phenomenal beard risk its deterioration by remaining in Ireland? Is the destructive nature of Ireland on a man's beard enough to destroy even this guy's?

Michaelblake, run fast, run for your life!! You must be in a place that is more beard friendly. What better place than here in the Marx Brothers? It is your destiny!!!

2010-04-21T06:57:00.018+02:00

To further our recent initiative (and in the spirit of hockey playoff season) the members of Marx Brothers are working on our own beards. Our objective is to further our initiative by competing in the World Beard Championships in Alaska. As you can see, some are coming in very nicely, others....well, I can't call them nice by any means....

Here you see Father Sipwell, leading some fo the the lemmings (a.k.a. followers) in a well known Marx Brothers chant. As you can see, the robe is patterened after his Dynamo Marx uniforms, and the beard is quite full... fitting for Sipwell, who is always full of "it"... You can see the beginnings of an uprising in the faces of the followers, they feel the need to fight about something, also the norm on Mt. Marx.

Here you can see Cow, Gaston, and Bladesman. Cow and Gaston are going with the more dapper look, trying to dress appropriately. Blades, however, is dressed like he is off to an English soccer match. We must take this time to warn Blades officially that hooliganism is not something that will be tolerated among the Brothers of Marx, nor is that hairdo...

Other participating members include Soccerduke and Lenar. Lenar is having trouble keeping his beard clean, much like his socks... Soccerduke keeps his beard meticulously combed, thereby keeping all traces of "stored for later" food from collecting there.

Even Airfix Christy and Sweden's own Linda are in on the plan... Christine is looking overdressed, and a bit naked without her Fulham drum. I wonder if she is as well manicured all over...? Just a thought.

Linda is looking lovely as usual, the beard makes a nice accessory for her I think.

Jimmykilcoo's got a brand new bag...again

So we move on to the giant sendoff party before the team departs for Alaska:

Father Sipwell rocks out!

Anionic and GentleMan follow suit as well...

FC Rath and Fred got the wrong idea, but hey, they're Irish still, and I think we've covered the issues with Irishmen and beards.

So we sent the team off, and they got maybe a little closer than we had hoped...

Ultimately, the team arrived safely in Alaska.

But hey, we were really just in it for the fun. The competition is always interesting, but in true Marx Brothers fashion, we knew a loss was assured before it even got started. Afterall, the competition had this guy:

So again, the conclusion is simple....we need to get this guy into MB, it is his destiny for certain! Help us PowerSoccerLand!

Why We All Should Grow a Beard!

2010-04-19T19:04:00.005+02:00

Here are the top 10 useful reasons for growing a beard. Don't look cool with a beard, steal someone else's, or find a friend who has a cool beard. Too young to grow a beard, give it some time, you'll be cool one day...

So there you have it...what more reason could you need?

Also, you can just do it to look pretty damned cool too...like this guy!

Doesn't he just look like he belongs here? Maybe we should go get him...

Save the Beard! (The Effects of Ireland on Beard Propagation)

2010-04-17T15:27:00.003+02:00

As Published in the Journal of Beard Science
(the Proceedings of the International Society of Beard Awareness)

Objectives:
To investigate and quantitatively prove the negative effects of Ireland on Beard Growth and promote awareness thereof; To convince certain PS users that for their own well-being they have no choice but to join the Marx Brothers Beard Recovery Program

Hypothesis:
Proximity to "Ireland" in all forms has a negative effect on Beard Propagation

Apparatus:
Google Images, Stephen Ireland, keyboard, mouse, internet connection

Methods:
Google image search "Stephen Ireland", cut image, paste image into report, develop narrative to suit one's purposes, wax propagandaic

Discussion:
Let us start at the beginning. When Stephen Ireland arrived at Manchester City he sported a half-decent head of hair, a baby-bump, and a beard (see Fig. 1).

(Fig. 1, The Subject with Child)

Things were going well. The birth was successful (baby Robinho did have a habit of thumb-sucking but soon returned to Brazil for rehabilitation, Fig. 2). Although his hair had disappeared, the beard remained healthy (Fig. 3).

<-- (Fig. 2, Baby Robinho Ireland)

(Fig. 3, Mother and Child Reunion) -->

With the passage of time and no corrective action taken, however, the alopecia spread, and the anxiety is clear from the subject's facial expression in figure 4:

Fig. 4, WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?!?

Conclusion:

For calculus fans out there, the mathematical expression would be as follows:

lim (dBeard/dt-Ireland) = 0, as t-->infinity.

For "visual learners", this is how it looks in a graph:

In order to avoid the complete eradicationof michaelblake's beard, we (the Marx Brothers Association of Concerned Beard-Lovers) strongly recommend that he leave Ireland forthwith and join our recovery program.

DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!

Ooooh Iha Iha I'm still alive!

2010-04-16T15:33:00.002+02:00

Earlier this morning, I was pushed with a large broomstick (pictured left) to post on this blog, once more. In fact, I was told that if I were not to blog today, I would lose my MB moustache and the petitioner in question would haunt me all day and all night long. One blog post today would save me from writing one thousand blog posts in years to come, he said, as that would be my punishment. The mere idea that I might have to get out of my lazy chair on a daily basis, concocting stories nobody believes was as horrifying as picturing the dictatoresque broomstick-yielding manbeast naked, so I subsumed.

So, here I am, filling half a page with nonsense and gobbledegook, something I am highly qualified to write. In fact, now that I start to think about it: did I ever write something useful? Was I ever brave enough to wrap my sensible thoughts in a blog post that would stand out, not for its surreal absurdism but for its inherent qualities? I can come up with one, at the very start of this blogging adventure, when Airfix_9 and myself created what is still known as the Joker amongst clans, Marx Brothers. All the rest were a travel through wittyland, with numerous highfliers and practical jokes… and the still horrendous story about Airfix_9 presenting himself as a man in the game whilst being a ladybird outside of it. Now that I think of it: I did write sensible things at that moment onwards. I pressed AF9 to be who she really is, instead of hiding behind a veil of anonymity. She should be proud to be the first female CA, MA and now even HMA instead of hiding behind a so called manliness.

(would these mesmerations already suffice for that monsterly man or should I continue?)

In any case: for all of you who thought the mighty sipwell became unable to formulate phrases, use difficult words even though his mother tongue is not English and write half a page of something you’d might think: what did I read this for? Here is your answer: I can still do it… (and I admit grudgingly that I will do it more often in future).

Hail Marx Brothers! Hail the talents they command!

The sun is shining. Time to get the rockchair out in the open and do a nap.

Oh, and in case you were contemplating whether the petitioner was a witch, he was.

2010-04-15T21:25:00.002+02:00

Yes, we tried having our own blog for a while...but we realized that we are much more interesting when we stick to pointless incessant barking. So that is what we will return to doing from now on...

World of Useless Facts

2010-04-15T18:56:00.007+02:00

2 months without a single blog, my god what were we thinking about? Seriously, some say that we are dying out and that we are no longer the clan we once were. When I was first inducted into MB I was informed that blogging was essential, as I love to write about mainly irrelevant things I thought great. Lone be hold it has been weeks / months since my last post and this is totally unacceptable. So today I would like to share my useless knowledge random things:

1) Beetles taste like apples, wasps like pine nuts, and worms like fried bacon. (Yum)

2)Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people (I am left handed....Bugger)

3)It's against the law to burp, or sneeze in a church in Nebraska, USA.(Amen)

4)A man named Charles Osborne had the hiccups for 69 years!(bless him)

5)The longest place name still in use is: Taumatawhakatangihangaoauauotameteat uripukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenua kitanatahu

-- a New Zealand hill. (Try saying that)

6)Banging your head against a wall burns 150 calories(Beats slim fast I suppose)

Well that's 6 facts that are pretty pointless but hope you enjoyed the read, if not enjoy this pretty picture :D

The Revival is Upon Us...or Else!

2010-04-15T16:18:00.003+02:00

Indeed I have come to notice that, through as much my own lack of initiative recently (as well as that of the rest of our great brotherhood), that it indeed appears that we are dead. The wittiest of the not-so-witty have apparently packed up shop and fled Mt. Marx for a life in the countryside of the less than mediocre. It once was so that alot of users wanted to be Marx's, and we continually got applications/request/etc. We had readers aplenty for this great blog (the only place where our mediocrity turned to greatness). We asked who we wanted for brothers, and rarely, if ever, were told "no thanks". When others asked us to join their clans, our reply was simply, "no thanks, I am in MB", which invariably led to a dejected, "oh, alright" from them. Today, when i get asked, and give the same reply, the response is typically either, "MB is still around?", or "who is MB?". This will not stand!

This led me to the realization that, this is not who we are. We are the Marx Brothers! We are the creative, witty, strange, comical chaps who once were more widely read that PS Extra (of course that site has always been run by Marxian MAs, but who am I to argue...oh wait, I AM the guy who argues...

Anyhow, we need to look inside ourselves and find our greater strength, the strength to rise up once again and take our rightful place atop the giant scrap pile of mediocrity that surrounds us. It is time to trim back the overgrowth that covers Mt. Marx, and restore it to all its prior mediocre-ness. I know deep in my heart that we can do this, afterall, it's not like we spend our time playing matches or anything (and all of our admin duties are no excuse that we can't each come up with a decent blog post once every week or so).

I for one stand ready to drive this once mediocre clan back to where we once were (wherever that was...), so we can once again be proud to proclaim:
I AM A MARX BROTHER!

Two days ago I announced a bold new initiative, and a distinct change in the course of our history. In 2 full days, that post has not one comment, not one message has been sent to me about it, in fact, I'm not sure one of you has even read it... We must gather together in this dire time...who's with me?

A Clear Case of Discrimination

2010-04-14T06:09:00.008+02:00

Well, it has been brought to our attention that we have been crass, rude, unnecessarily sarcastic, and just plain obnoxious...so thank you for the compliments.....
We have also been made aware that we have been discriminatory, this we can not accept. It is true that we have a great history of facial hair, and worshipping the great mustaches in history, especially the one Christine use to have (and still refuses to regrow)...perhaps she will in protest of Fulham outlawing the drum...

Beards come in many shapes and sizes, some cooler than others...

But yes, in all our rightful outpouring of love for mustaches, we have regrettably overlooked that other great option in men's facial furr, the beard. I am quite unsure how this has happened, but we will do everything in our powers to rectify the situation (see the end for more info there....and no, don't skip ahead).

History of the Beard
“A beard is the hair that grows on a man's chin, cheeks, and the area above the upper lip. It is also a sign of his awesomeness.

God invented the Beard in 293 BC when he blessed the previously beardless Moses The Inadequate with a stylish goatee that was later imitated by pirates, beatniks and Skeet Ulrich. Fully bearded and thus very virile, intelligent and as strong as an (bearded) ox, the newly christened "Moses The Bearded Destroyer of Hairless Men" undertook God's holy mission of ending the enslavement of the Jews by defeating the Evil Psychic Beardless Pharaoh in a game of air hockey.

Moses won the game without dropping a point. But he slew the Pharaoh anyway and led the Jews out of Egypt. He would later part the Red Sea (of Doom) by studiously stroking his magnificent goatee and praising The Beard of God. The Jews would spend 150 years in the wilderness worshipping and grooming Moses' goatee until he died at the grand old age of 6000 years old. His beard was five miles long and full of sandwiches and treasure. Sandwiches kick ass. But not as much as beards.

In recent years a group of Swedish scientists and their sexy redheaded assistants at the Gothenburg Institute have found undisputable scientific evidence that men with facial hair are wiser and more sexually potent than their beardless contemporaries. The group concluded that throughout history it has been proven categorically that the men with beards that have successfully toppled armies with nothing more than a twirling of the whiskers. They also discovered that it was the prehistoric bearded men who were the first to discover fire, by rubbing two sticks together and fanning the fragile flames with their humongous mutant beards. The bearded man went on to invent the wheel, create the broadsword and defeat the army of evil (beardless) dinosaurs that were trying to enslave mankind. He even taught dogs how to fetch. It is without doubt because of this that bearded men are afforded such high status throughout the universe.

Men who remain beardless are known to show a lack of cleanliness and refinement. In fact it is well known that man without a beard is prone to crankiness and often exhibits an eccentric disposition. Beardless men have a long and troubled history throughout the known universe that has dogged each and every one of them like the filthy blasphemous heretics that they are. Look at Michael Jackson.
All hail the awesomeness of The Beard! (Source:)

So, we here at Mt. Marx feel understandably terrible about this inexcusable oversight on our part, and as such, will launch a campaign to promote Beard Awareness….

In fact, this campaign has already begun. We have started to grow our own beards, and have included a few examples below….

Also, as a final step in our initiative to promote Beard Awareness, MB plans to add one lucky user to the team. Our search will therefore begin to find the PS user who exhibits the traits of the standard Marx Brother member, while sporting the coolest beard in PSland. We will have to rely on the wide reach of our blog, and the many great users of PS to help us find out who this person is (at this point we have no idea). So, your missions, should you choose to accept it, is to bring us the man with the truly Awesome beard, and bring him to us (or at minimum bring us the beard, and we’ll let it join). This great man will become the newest member of the brotherhood that is the Marx Brothers.

Good Luck in your mission, and Godspeed!

Here is an example of what we are looking for:

Damnit! I told you not to skip ahead....now go back and read it again....

marx brothers at war: slap-happy

2010-02-11T04:28:00.002+01:00

marriedtothesea.com

And sipwell said to raphy84, stop hitting yourself. But the Rebels of Liberty could not stop, for the brothers marx were hitting them, with their own hands.

State of the Clan

2010-02-01T23:20:00.003+01:00

I've been made leader in the midst of domestic and interclan threats. These are more real then ever (haha not) and I hope to do my best to address these crucial issues.

(Filibuster)

"The initial step to decipher how best to clean your carpet or rugs is to find out what type it actually is. Is yours made of wool, plant fibers, silk or synthetics? Each one is cleaned differently with different detergents and products. An example of this is that wool can never be cleaned with any heated products or machines, and no bleach can ever be applied. You need to be aware of this if your carpet is wool, otherwise you may cause irreparable damage when trying to clean it.

Next, you must decide which cleaning product has the best capabilities for your type of carpet and carpet cleaning needs. You aren't just trying to rinse it with water then dry it again, and you need product to break down dirt and dust, draw out deep down build up and kill germs and bacteria, all while maintaining the original beauty of the pile.

Knowing what type of carpet you have may end up saving you money by allowing you to clean it yourself, without having to hire a professional. You've invested in your carpet, it might be an idea to invest in a carpet cleaning machine- but which one? Steam cleaner or dry cleaning? So many choices. Fortunately, we aim to make the decisions a little easier for your unique situation."

Now that does who were my opposition who tried to bore us to sleep have fallen asleep themselves, I shall address what was previously stated.

The biggest thread to our safety is myself. It could be a click, a word, or a movement in the wrong direction and things can go spiraling down, down, down. Fortunately, I've already done that somewhere else.

Outside of the clan the biggest thread comes from our dearest friend, minikicker. His methods of persuasion are almost enough to break me. Otherwise it seems some have set their eyes on members inside of us. NO! We must remain the hypocrite we've always been and stop this at all costs (despite the origin of the majority of our members). If we passively stayed still, why, all would be for naught.

Last but not least this message is meant as a Hi!

Snow Joke

2010-01-24T21:00:00.018+01:00

After the big freeze that was suddenly thrust upon us with only the previous year being just as cold and white, Britain was once again hit by what can only be described as Snow. Thats right we had snow and the whole country decided that it was time for a panic. So now it is all over I would like to show you 1 or 2 pictures that I found when I was browsing on google.

In this first picture you have a brilliant sight, which is the London Eye with the motto "If you want to

be taken for a ride by British Airways , ride this"

As you can see that it is a lovely sight with the London Eye being lit up and reflected off of the snow magnificently

My second image is, well the best way I can describe this is a fantastic way to spend our tax payers money.

Thats right, Police sledging on riot shields. Personally I thought this was fantastic and if I was there, I would most certainly be joining in the fun, maybe laying out a course using police tape and marking a finish line with pepper spray.

Now my third and final image is so funny and I swear this is not photoshopped at all. I will describe this as, a result of inbreeding. (So don't marry your sister)

Two people who thought it would be funny to go driving down a frozen canal. Evidently not. But hey we have to make the best of the weather. :)

So what have we learned from this weather we have had?

1) London looks pretty in lights and snow.

2) Police like to have fun just like us all.

3) Canals are made for barges, ducks and fish not, I repeat not cars!!

Well that's it for my "After the weather has hit us" report. (I find doing them sometime after to be more accurate)

The next one of my "After the weather has hit us" report: The great floods of the Irish Sea :D

MB are beautiful Swans

2010-01-11T11:55:00.001+01:00

When I enter a (clan) cup, I often get a response that Marx Brothers play football like women: they have no technique and no talent for tactics and that’s the reason why they lose. I mostly slap these people in the face with my pink handbag. It turns out that Airfix_9, although he wanted to make a laughing stock of me, turned out to have developed quite a useful attribute in the game of Powersoccer.
However, recently I came across a video that very much reminded me that Marx Brothers do play like women and that they actually should pride themselves in doing so. Perhaps we aren’t the best at the game of football – the standings of many of the MBs says the opposite but this is NOT taken into account while making this observation, so don’t you dare to use it as a counterargument – but we are gracious swans in a pool of ugly fat (and lame) ducks. Marx Brothers believe in a higher cause which is bringing beauty to the world of Powersoccer. The pretty faces of most of the clan members corroborates that (isn’t Gentle_man_ the cutest rabbit you have ever seen? Don’t you want to eat him right away?) and although Airfix_9 isn’t the prettiest of our lot – in fact: of any lot – and although God himself only got a D – for designing her, we all know that deep down inside she is a beautiful woman (really deep, but nevertheless: it is there).

Raise your chin, look towards 2010 positively and remind yourself who you truly are. You, my dearest MB, are a beautiful ballerina with a fabulous and gracious ball handling technique:

DR.ABCD

2010-01-08T13:14:00.006+01:00

In Australia (the place where men that survive shark attacks daily and walk upside down) there is a magically "CPR" style way to treat victims. Unfortunately, our blog has come under great distress recently due to lack of activity, and Professor Eindhatre is here to revive it... by giving it a bit of DR. ABCD. However, I am not a sticker for the textbooks and theories so I'm going straight to the last D: defibrillation. So, on that note, here goes...:

Don't ask what is with the Doritos. Free advertising. Stupid things. Couldn't find one in European for you all to understand, so that'll have to do...

Shocking News

2009-12-14T07:59:00.002+01:00

This will come as a shock to you, but I have decided that it will be better if the whole power soccer community knows about it, so there are no more dark secrets. I called a press conference, and for some strange reason no-one came. This is what lead to me making this announcement on the greatest ever blog. And here it is:

Tiger Woods also had an affair with me. You guys will probably think this news is like, so 2 weeks ago, but it is still relative, even though I am the 162nd person to say this. I have decided to quit power soccer indefinitely to focus my attention on becoming a better person, soccer player and admin. I trust the paparazzi will leave me and my family in peace in these tough times.

I am aware of the many billions of dollars this will cost PS, but I feel it is worth it, family before PS. For possibly the last time,
henry9876.

jimmykilcoo's got a brand new bag

2009-11-05T01:58:00.003+01:00

the other night we were over at mama and papa kilcoo's house, and papakilcoo indicated that he no longer had use for his media-network-centre, a.k.a. the massively under-used xbox360.

i say massively-underused because mrs kilcoo abhors video games, and mr kilcoo only has fingers on one hand (true story, but not as exciting as it sounds so we won't explore that). this meant that it was being used as a dvd player and conduit through which family photos on the hard drive in the basement were viewed on the big screen.

they upgraded to a mad propah swish new unit, which left poor little xbox360kilcoo going spare. so i decided to give him a loving home (much to the chagrin of ms. jimmykilcoo). i got it all set up, played a few unsatisfying rounds of the sample pingpong game they had, and thought... what kind of game is my favourite to play, that i haven't been able to play for a while, largely due to computer-crapness-and-site-security-concern-related frustrations?

e-footie, of course!

and what popular, if heretical-to-mention-in-this-blog, e-footie game has recently released a sexy new version complete with every crease and pock-mark in wayne rooney's ugly mug, and headers that are rarely (if EVER) successful?

that's right folks, jimmykilcoo bought fifa10. and it. is. amazing. i don't even feel guilty about it.

Ode to Sippy

2009-10-28T01:56:00.002+01:00

We should celebrate our beloved half-goat half-cementmixer in song. I will start, please join in when you feel the rhythm...

Well he's the king of the Spammers
The Forum VIP
Sip heard the call
Now he bores us all
And that's what's botherin' me

He just wants to spread opinion
He don't care if it stinks
He never stops
Types till he drops
He drives us all to drink

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh oobedoo
We wanna be like you you you
We wanna type like you
We wanna spam like you
oo-oo-oo-oo

You see it's true-oo-oo
MAs like me-ee-ee
Just want to be
Spa-a-ammers too-oo-oo

(with humble apologies to Walt Disney)

Here is Sip singing his own version:

My Musical Journey

2009-10-17T21:36:00.002+02:00

It would seem that numerous lies are being spread about my musical prowess and I have to say, I am not happy about it, not by a long chalk!

I have worked tirelessly to become as accomplished musician as I doubtless am and I am justifiably proud of all that I have achieved in my musical career.

I have just completed a sell-out tour with the Portsmouth Sinfonia where our piece de resistance, The Classical Muddley, regularly saw us receive a standing ovation of not less than 5 minutes.

Those people paid for the privilege of hearing our work, to you - my friends - I give it free. See if you can spot me and, for a bonus point, tell me what instrument I was playing.

As you can tell, I am not one to blow my own trumpet.

I blow someone else's!!!

On teaching an old dog new tricks...

2009-10-17T05:45:00.003+02:00

I recently half-returned* to the fine establishment that the french call "Foot-Pouvoir"** to learn that our esteemed colleague Airfix_9 has blatted his way to the ripe old age of forty-three. Happy belated, sir! What has he been up to since finally reaching maturity (cough)?

Well, I like to imagine that he has taken up jazz guitar. Here you will find hidden-camera footage of Mr.Fix with some friends*** (that's sipwell on the bass, bladesman on the drums and of course bigdaddyat tickling the ivories), jammin' hard at an undisclosed location: in the bowels of a North Sea oil rig - the only place where the audience can reliably be drunk enough to applaud such an atrocity.

-jimmyk

* by half-returned i mean to say that i have managed to make some official matches work and get my rank active again. jimmykilcoo will remain a shell of the crazed PS lunatic he once was (he pledged to himself, his employer, and ms. jimmykilcoo).

** they don't call it that

*** my sincerest apologies to the great geniuses Oscar "not bigdaddyat" Peterson and Joe "not airfix_9" Pass. the timing of the nonsense - especially on the piano and guitar - coupled with the jazz-faces they are all making, is absolutely fantastic. if you haven't heard of messrs Peterson and Pass, here's what that concert actually sounded like:

hot DAMN oscar peterson swings like a (censored). he was a canadian treasure! i was at a club here once, not long before he died, and he walked in to watch the show. when he came into the room the musicians on stage had this expression of awe and reverence and they knew they were being paid a deep respect by having him in the audience. great moment. :)

Airfix_9 turns 43... Challenging for all of us (including you)

2009-10-09T15:23:00.000+02:00

There is a expression running that says “if you got wrinkles, it means you are wise.” It is a way of comforting women who are getting older and slightly more unsure of themselves.
Of course, every saying gets its exceptions and our dearest Airfix_9, Christine for all her friends, is a case in prime. Not only is she an ugly old tart, she has less wisdom than a four year old wondering (and putting it to the test) whether if he eats the opponents of his lego-army they can be considered defeated. (As my four year old nephew can testify: they are not. In fact, their retaliation is so much graver that he actually had to surrender to the undigested lego soldiers in his stomach).

When you reach a certain age – in more modern language: when you were already considered an adult when the first computer appeared on the market – every so-called anniversary is a day you quickly want to forget. You meet people congratulating you with a big sarcastic smile on their face (you are yet again older than you were before), the cashier at the counter of the grocery store doesn’t even consider to call you “Miss” anymore and your friends decide to buy you a box of Pampers for grown-ups (Another saying goes: in the speech of the fool, there is always a lot of truth to be found). It is, in other words, a disastrous period in the year.

Christine is approaching such a period. She will be of unmentionable age next Sunday. My snitches over at the Fulham Centre for the Gravely Insane informed me that she is borderline depressed at the moment, spending her afternoons drinking tea (but above all scrunching cupcakes) whilst saying completely senseless things like “When I was young, our boys liberated the Falklands” (which is, I can assure you, at least 30 years off).

Strange as it may sound but we all kind of like – and some even love – our dearest Christine. She has her moments of wit and the phases of insanity are for most of us equally amusing. We know we can have an easy win when we play her (which is nice of her, not being talented at all to play this game) and she does her MA duties with a lot of style and finesse. She isn’t that bad, after all.

That is why the Marx Brothers decided to help Christine through this difficult period. We will guard her house, check the presents she gets (and get all the rubbish out) and we have hired a bunch of 44 year old women to show her: see, it can become even worse (next year let’s say). We do however expect the community to tip in as well hence we have a triple assignment!

First we want you to make drawings of how you see Christine. What does she look like according to you? Is she tall, small, slim or skinny? Is she a natural or fake blonde (Blonde she is, I can give you as much)? Is she perhaps a blonde baboon or a dinosaur? Draw it! Show us your skills!

Second we want you to write an “essay” on what you believe Christine could have done better. The first line of the essay therefore should be: “If I were Christine, I would have …”

Third: we want you to find the cheapest botox clinic in the world. It doesn’t matter whether the conditions are completely unsafe or the botox is of less-than-bad quality. Just the cheapest! Browse the internet, help us out otherwise it will be very hard for us to raise enough funds to actually pay for it.

We will not award a prize. We just want people to understand that Christine is fundamental for this community, that she is “more than great” and that all those mean men out there laughing at her age are completely unjust and unfair. So what if she turns 43 next Sunday!!!! With our botox cure she will without any doubt stay 43 for the rest of her life. And the wisdom, well, if she keeps on dyeing her hair she will never turn grey but remain blonde for the rest of her time.

So, chop chop! Off you go! Start drawing, start writing and start browsing!!! The best of all will be shown on the Marx Brothers blog, which is in serious need of renewed laughter.

Sipwell
President of the Official “Christine = 43” Committee
Head of the “Why be bored if you can have a laugh at…” Section of the Sarcasm Society

MB newsletter

2009-09-14T19:40:00.005+02:00

Many things have happened in recent weeks:

1) New Captain

After Airfix_9, Gaston0802 and Mfsoccer94, time has come for Sipwell to lead our "clan".
Unfortunately, he decided to assign me and Bladesman1 as Co-Captain.
Reasons for the change? Well, we were all tired of our young tyrant and decided to ... have a look at this short video (43 seconds).
Featuring Airfix_9 as the kid with the yellow shirt, Adeidos as cameraman and Mfsoccer94 as the fat red guy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b89CnP0Iq30

2) Two new members

Welcome to Eindhatre_marx and Fred1212!

The first one is an old member of us, he joined in the past and unfortunately had to leave the game. He's well-known for his witty and great post, like this one:
http://powerchallenge.com/?p=forum&sub=topic&topic_id=124436&forum_id=4&sport=forums&uqid=1250072562

Fred was presented to us by our old Irish mate Fcrathnaconeen. His writing talent and joking ability was enough to convince our gang to let him in. But strangely, he hasn't posted yet in our blog..

3) Veteran users leaving our gang

Leedomargus
Nycfootballer
Tommyroels

I would like to thank them very much. They have been great mates and even if they won me every time we played together (except Nyc, he was almost as bad as me!), it was always a big deal of fun. Good luck guys!

That's all for now, enjoy the game!

Accident de parcours: Gentle_man_ gets to level 99

2009-08-07T00:38:00.002+02:00

Some philosophers consider that our life is made up of accidental meetings. We bump into people we are going to marry later on in bars, discos or in the case of Airfix_9 in the row to get shelter that night. Who we are and what we become is a linkage of accidental events. If you weren’t attending that school and having that teacher, your life would have been completely different. If you weren’t under the influence of those bad friends you met in your football club – yes, swedeswede and soccerduke37, looking at you guys – you would have put more time in training than in drinking Mountain Dew afterwards. Can we ever know how many great football players we missed like that?

Gentle_man_ has taken that philosophical claim too literally the other day. Preparing for his final game towards level 99, he decided to participate in a cup. Just one game, preferably a loss, and he would be ready to get to level 99 in one of the famous Marx Brothers tournaments, to which even Sipwell participates and thus gladly enters a cup room (note: not a gameroom). But alas, just like the scorpion wasn’t able to control his nature and not sting the turtle that was swimming him to the other side of the river, Gentle_man_ couldn’t control his temper and not win all of his game. He even withdrew from the cup (some bystanders said after he won both games) but alas… it was too late: he was level 99 by accident!

By doing so, he broke a rather remarkable record. He is the first ever user to ever play accidentally to level 99. He didn’t make a big fuss about it (still hitting his head against the wall) but we should still congratulate him with this great achievement. As a song, which is the tradition here at MB, I chose for a good old (and basically very ironic in this context) Dutch classic "We Zullen doorgaan" (We shall move on as in: we won't give up)

Congratulations my friend!!!!

Ingeniously Devious Plan

2009-08-02T00:46:00.002+02:00

Responding to the post below me. All I have to say is we need an ingeniously devious plan because anything else would not work. I'm thinking we put a carrot in a cage just tall enough for the bunny, so that when it enters the pancake drops off and hits a plate already soaked in syrup. Thus, the pancake shall be ours! Yay!

I don't remember what you were taking about duke but that sure was some good maple syrup. Maybe jimmy has more. Now to find jimmy....

The Marx Brothers: who does the real work?

2009-07-28T04:53:00.005+02:00

Hello mates, as you may have noticed (and if you haven’t then either you can’t read this text or you very recently got glasses) there has been a change on the throne of Mt. Marx. Mfsoccer94 willingly accepted the very tough, backbreaking, headache giving, coma inducing, and [insert bad thing here]ing task of becoming the clan captain of Marx brothers. The former clan captain, Gaston, gladly stepped down after months of torture. This is what he looked like during his reign as captain.

Miserable, wasn’t he? Anyways, as mfs took his seat in the throne, MB land surprisingly did not go into chaos! It actually prospered. Mfs told all members he loved them and then he gave us cookies. All of us folk with no rank went to the beach and met a group of 28 nineteen year old Swedish beauties. Life could not be better. The following day we all went our separate ways, back to our homes; mfs was nice enough to get me a plane to Antarctica!

Back at home, I snuggled into my special sleeping spot and began to doze off. But before I drifted away in sleep, I began wondering how the clan was prospering so well since us common members did absolutely nothing for the clan! As I am always curious, (they call me curious ~~george~~ duke) I woke up early in the morning and slipped into the ocean, on my way to find mfs.

He was not hard to find, as one night I had surgically implanted one of the most high tech tracking systems (a sock of lenar) into his body. The sock instantly wiped out his sense of smell so he never noticed. The scent was smell-able from however far Antarctica is from where mfs lurked (yes, now you know that the world does not smell from pollution or garbage, but socks). As my long swim concluded, I found myself on familiar ground, the huge icy island of Greenland. I tracked him to a small hut in the exact geographic center of the island. Inside the house was dimly lit. I peeked through a window. In awe, I saw how mfs had managed to keep the clan working without the labor of the members. It suddenly made since why Sipwell and Christine had dashed from the co-captaincy as soon as mfs took the throne.

Inside I saw the two current co-captains, jimmykilcoo and fcrathnaconeen, chained to cold metal chairs. They were balling their eyes out due to mfs’ very original and uncommon weapon.

Yes, mfs was using an onion, actually called a gas onion. The poor co captains wished that they had no senses, as they felt very hot fire, smelled lenar’s sock, saw nothing because their face was filled with tears, heard a very high pitched sound coming from mfs mouth (I think he was trying to use sonar, he does seem to be fascinated with bats), and tasted nothing really (except defeat but that sounds cheesy). It was all I could do to keep my head peeking through that window, as I too smelled the stench of lenar’s sock. After ten minutes of this, Jimmy shouted “OK, we give in!” and fc nodded in agreement. Mfs smiled, and snapped his fingers.

Out of the ground laptops popped out on metal stands, completely cornering the unfortunate co-captains. Their hands were unbound and they immediately got to work on the tough task of managing the Marx Brothers. They did not stop. My head stayed perched on that window for 21 hours and they continuously worked. Worked and worked to keep the Marx Empire clean and shiny. When they fell asleep they were shocked awake. When they got hungry they were fed onions. This (apart from seeing sipwell dance) was the most miserable time of my life. Fc often cried for help on the Marx Brothers clan forum, but his cries were ignored as mfs continuously told us that he loved us and that we can do whatever we want. We simply figured the two co-captains had gone mad (as all of our co-captains have been mad). Whenever a MB member began believing these cries for help, he would just post this image:

..which made us all say, “look! A bunny with a pancake on its head! Anyways, as I was merely an evil penguin who hated the smell of lenar’s socks, all I could do to help them was to swim back home, boot up my coffee-puter and make this post.

So Marx brothers members, will you help me put down this evil Captain. Will you help me save our beloved co-captains from this onion torture! I FOR ONE, WILL NOT –

Ooohhhhh a bunny with a pancake on its head!

Mfsoccer94 Hits 2 Years of Power Soccer

2009-07-19T17:44:00.001+02:00

Joining July 20, 2007; the day before my birthday. I must have been very bored that day, searching miniclip, playing games. It was then that I came across this wonderful game, at the time it was called Power Football. That marked the beginning of my journey.

Back then, the forums were mostly inactive. Barely anyone had over 2000 posts and it was easy to be a top poster. I was even one of them, yes I was. But what struck me is that I had not posted in the forums until a month after I joined. A friendly leedomargus was the first to ever reply to that post. Thus began my forum career. I never made it to the top forumer, and never really cared much. But I was number 3 for a while. I barely posted in the beginning, but then was everyone you looked.

January 14, 2008. Sipwell contacted me via guestbook suggesting me to write an article to apply for reporter. Turns out, I took his advice. My first article, "New features for Power Soccer" was a hit. Powdersnow loved the article and accepted me as a reporter. He even published the article on the homepage! Here you can read the article: powersoccerextra.wordpress.com/2008/02/18/new-feat... I have written many articles for Power Soccer Extra under the great polidoro76. To see some of my articles, just search mfsoccer94 on Power Soccer Extra. Polidoro created Power Soccer Extra but unfortunately had retired and asked for his account to be deleted months after. That marked another spark in my career. After his retirement, I was appointed Editor of the reporters. This means that I would read, edit, and publish every article submitted and then they would appear on the dashboard when I wanted them to. Power Soccer Extra has had many changes, we first began at powersoccerextra.weebly.com... We were a small group consisting of about 5 reporters. Some included sc0obie and mr.admin. During the summer, it was time for a resign.

On August 12, 2008, I resigned from reporter. My closing remarks were, "January 12, 2008: The day we switched to wordpress. The day my first article was published on Power Soccer Extra. The day I became a reporter. Polidoro76, one of the friendliest guys you will meet, the old Editor of reporters who had given me his job as Editor. I will never regret the days I have edited, written articles and have made friends. Power Soccer Extra is like a home to me, its just time I need to resign. High school is starting, work increasing...its time for an end. Great times I have had, which will never be forgotten. Anionic, the most recent addition to the family, a great Master Assistant who I immediately became friends with. Through ideas, structure, reorganizing the reporters and more, I will never forget you. Hogweed, the Head Master Assistant, who would check up on me time to time, who would help me when I'm down and when I'm just not sure what to do. Thanks for everything. Last but not least, Sipwell, who recommended me to apply for reporter, look how far I've come. And to all of you, thanks for making my journey a good one." Many users were upset at my resign, but I knew things would come.

Along the journey, I had originally began as a BDKAS. BDKAS was the first clan and stood for Biggy007, Dagriggstar, Kishan, mr.Admin, and soccerduke27. I spent a while in that clan but things were falling apart. I believe that dagriggstar was retiring and it was time to go. Soccerduke27 and I both joined Marx Brothers. Ever since then, I have been in MB. When the official clans system came on 11/12/2008, I was officially a MB. I have met great guys and linda, hehe in that clan, and enjoy it so much. Today, I am the captain of MB.

I am the captain of Sweden National Team which am I proud of. I wanted to give back to the crew originally for all they have done so I applied to be captain of Sweden. I played for them in the Euro 2008 on Power Soccer which was so much fun. Leedomargus was a great support too.

I have accomplished so many things while being here at Power Soccer. I am number one in USA for the first time ever. 7/6/09 began my reign as number one. I am amazed and proud to be number one as I have worked very hard to accomplish it. I know I am not the best at Power Soccer though and expect people to catch up to me soon.

I write this article with many thoughts in mind as to hope to be writing this article with more news in years to come. Tomorrow marks the official 2 years of mfsoccer94 and Power Soccer and Tuesday is my birthday.

Thank you for reading.
Mfsoccer94

while the cat's away

2009-07-18T15:29:00.003+02:00

the mice will... do nerdy stuff and not get into trouble.

my girlfriend (along with all my mates' respective female cohabitants) is (are) away at a bachelorette party at a cottage in the Halliburton Highlands (AF9 has been there, she can vouch that that is a nice part of Ontario - in the rocky Canadian Shield, forests, lakes, my girlfriend and her hot friends in bikinis, yes, very picturesque, WHY am i not there?).

so what do we do? hire a small army of, er, classy ladies to entertain us (the kind who are programmed to remove clothing when music is played)? get a few kegs of "special drink" and render ourselves unconscious until 5 minutes before leaving for work on monday morning?

sadly, no. but the next best thing: we get tickets to the TORONTO FC vs Houston Dynamo match, and make plans to bike down to the field for a good old hops-and-barley-fueled two hours of shouting obscenities at the w@nkers from Texas who aren't wearing red. This video is shot from the supporters' end, which is where my seats are. Bedlam :)

then disaster strikes: the alcohol authority here busted the stadium for selling beer to minors (details, details) last year, and the stadium chose THIS GAME to serve the stadium beer-ban. WHY, cruel gods of Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment?! First you ruin my hockey team, and destroy the love of my childhood. Then you secure an NBA franchise and name it something as unbelievably stupid as the RAPTORS just because Jurassic Park was a popular movie at the time.

Now this. Football with no beer. Where are we, the prohibition-era united states? Or even worse - EUROPE?!?! (they had no beer at the game i saw in Lyon a couple years ago - what gives, europe is supposed to be cool).

anyway. see here the contents of my bicycle basket, assembled this morning.

V8 because we're health-conscious metro$exuals who won't be able to get any vitamins inside the stadium (only hotdogs).

cigars for the pub post-game, where we'll be watching Canada gut Honduras at the gold cup this afternoon (COME ON LADS)

shirt & socks, because it's about a 20km bike ride to the stadium and 15km back to the pub, and i don't want to be sweaty all day. what if we come across some of the aforementioned classy ladies along the way, i ask? can't be a complete mess.

sunglasses, because there isn't a cloud in the sky :)

enjoy your weekend, MB.

Our Blog

2009-07-16T18:39:00.000+02:00

I have received an email from blogger.com. advising me that their server has identified our blog as a potential "spam blog" - essentially a blog created to host links only. Now, I was a little worried about whether or not this was a hacking attempt so I logged into Blogger directly and, lo and behold, it would appear that they have, indeed, locked our site.

Reading their description of what constitutes a "spam blog", I see this from their website (www.google.com/support/blogger/bin/answer.py?answe...):

Blogger say: "Blogs engaged in this behavior are called spam blogs, and can be recognized by their irrelevant, repetitive, or nonsensical text, along with a large number of links, usually all pointing to a single site."

Irrelevant? Repetitive? (Repetitive?) NONSENSICAL????

Guilty as charged!

Anyway, I have appealed against the decision and we await further information. I'll keep you posted

Bigdaddyat Joins a Magical Club...

2009-07-16T18:20:00.002+02:00

In great numbers we showed up for the 99er game of Bigdaddyat. He had promised us some months back he would get there soon. In fact, I even recall a discuss in which he said he wanted to be level 99 on the day he was 1 year in the game, a bit like me and (almost) Airfix_9 did. That should have been… February Second then!

But let’s not dwell on the past too much. He finally got there. Although we must say, that with his type of play, we are surprised he ever did. You have some people in this game that cannot stop losing, even if they play a level 4 with their level 97 account. Bigdaddyat belonged in that category. Some laddies over at Marx Brothers compiled over the last couple of months the best (and only) scoring opportunities Bigdaddyat had:

Yes dear readers, he had to count on pity of his opponent and hence only played level 99 Marx Brothers who accidentally kicked in a “winning” own goal in the last minute and who made a sport out of it to hit the post as much as possible. In fact, there is a secret “top list” of people hitting the post in a game versus Bigdaddyat. Mfsoccer94 has the honour of being on top, with 15 post hits for a 1-0 loss (throwing a ball to the keeper, who “accidentally” missteps: like you can see here)

But how come he ever got there then? Well, Bigdaddyat discovered a trick. He discovered a new and until now secret bug which he started to use in his advantage. He may be lousy at the game itself, but surely he is an inquisitive mind. Days and nights he was perfecting his special move. His wife called him to bed but instead… he gave her a gamepad to help him test it. His oldest son was given a pencil to draw (unsuccessfully) the exact situation. He hired truck drivers, construction workers and other (for this matter completely useless) handymen to get where he wanted.

Alas, it didn’t work out as planned:

Wait a minute… Wait a minute… Let’s watch that video again!

It did! A penalty was awarded for somebody who stood at least 2 metres (yes metres) off the player! My God Bigdaddyat! You surely deserve your level 99. It isn’t for you brilliant game play but for your endurance.

The Summer of Celebrations

2009-07-15T15:08:00.000+02:00

The Summer of 2009 will be Marx Brothers’ party summer. There are a lot of events coming in the next couple of weeks that will bring champagne (or orange juice), loud music and silly dances.
What will happen over in the summer:
1) Bigdaddyat will finally reach level 99. It has taken him a hell of a long time as he – in through Marx Brothers’ spirit – focused on losing;
2) Mfsoccer94 will be 2 years in the game. We are throwing a party just to celebrate our endurance: we kept up 2 years with this guy already! Praise the Lord.
3) Shaolinda will get to level 4. It is a promise she made and she will have to keep it.
4) Frogodo will be an ex-crew member. We already see he is infected with a serious Powdersnow disease in which he alternates complete gobbledygook with unimpressive roaring.
5) Adeidos will get his first “grown up” tooth;
6) Airfix_9 will be 2 years in the game and will have enjoyed us for two years with his witty remarks and absolutely lousy gameplay;
7) soccerduke27 will win his first game on a real football pitch;
8) swedeswede will score his first goal. It will be an own goal but that doesn’t matter;
9) Gentle_man_ will get to level 99;
10) Bladesman1 will get to level 99 too;

11) The most brilliant of them all, Sipwell, will be two years in the game to enjoy you with laughter, wisdom and overall generosity.

Preparing.

2009-07-15T03:54:00.002+02:00

Soon, as the crew announced, a lovely CM Only Forum will be released. This could easily turn into a mass tool of super propaganda, we can not let the starter chance slip away. We must travel to the edges of the new forum and create posts everywhere, spamming that would make sip spin.

Of course, only one thing can be done to ensure that Surreal is crushed, end all posts and threads with a simple motto or saying, slamming Surreal. If it's wit is a bulb short of a full box then it shan't be shone! Slandering along the lines of "You know what isn't Surreal, that it's soon dead", or "Hey look that shark has something in it!. Oh, it's just another Surreal Member".

Think now to jump on this once in a lifetime chance, we must act! Rally!

War plans

2009-07-13T02:36:00.002+02:00

As the long running war with Surreal comes to a close, not even a pitiful whimper like that from a cat lodged upside down in a running car engine can be heard. And so our minds must turn to those other challenges which remain. Which war shall we win next?

a. The War on Bacteria
b. The Korean War
c. The Price War
d. The War on Terror
e. The War over the misnaming of a species of the crysanthemeum plant

A: Our cleaning agents kill 99% of germs. Let's help them get that last 1%. Frogodo, you have access to Powdersnow's socks. Burn them. Burn them now!

B: A peace treaty has never been signed after almost 60 years. These guys clearly need a bit of Marx Brothers logic. They should understand a simple message: 'You lose some, you draw some.'

C: Convert all dollars and euros to Powertokens. Powertokens are a universal currency.

D. This one is easy enough. Remove Sipwell from the game.

E. If anyone knows any taxonomists, you should suggest to them the game: Combine your plant name with the one above it.

Airfix_9 Team of the Week!

2009-07-13T02:01:00.002+02:00

Yes, it is true! Our very own Christina has been awarded team of the week. She has no idea how on Earth she got it and either does anyone else! Hehe, just kidding. Airfix_9 is a great player, and I am glad she got this award. Such a nice thing to see before she goes to sleep.

Twiglets for all!

Congrats air!

-Mfsoccer94

Regime Change

2009-07-08T21:59:00.002+02:00

As mfsoccer just announced, the previous administration has been swept aside in favour of younger, completely inexperienced and underqualified people. This is built on the USA's "Bush-Cheney 2000" model of leadership, which I'm sure most will agree was wildly successful , so why not try it in MB?

Just as in the aforementioned case, my appointment as co-captain was doubtless a result of favouritism and patronage. You see, in the current league season, I have no chance of winning myself, but have probably spoiled the chances of mfsoccer's closest rivals, by shocking greg1291 with a 4-2 victory and holding revolution1910 to a tepid and dreary 0-0 draw (rev hit the post twice and the bar once, perhaps mfs should have made those inanimate objects co-captain instead?).

Without further ado, we are pleased to declare a new direction for the Marx Brothers. We will now be a band of RP-crazed, pro-lag-pro-cheat-pro-bug monsters to rival even the JCKASiest JCKASers that ever JCKASed.

This new dawn met a slight hitch last week while we were preparing for mfsoccer's birthday/inauguration celebrations. Please refer to secret video footage seen below:

Something different around here

2009-07-08T03:40:00.002+02:00

Have you guys noticed anything different on the Marx Brothers clan page on Power Challenge?

In case you didn't, here is what has happened the last few days.

Gaston0802 was forced to resign from his reign of being a captain of the Marx Brothers. With that being said, a new captain must rise.

It has been decided that I, mfsoccer94, will take over as captain for the Marx Brothers for the next month or so. If any clans want to do a clan battle any time soon, leave us a message on our clan guest book. I think we are up to it but we as a clan will decide whether we will play or not.

Enough about me, lets move on. I decided I wanted to give opportunities to those users in our clan who haven't been a co-captain yet. With that said, I would like to introduce the two wonderful new co-captains jimmykilcoo and fcrathnaconeen. These two users will be co-captains until something comes up or when I must resign.

Until then,
mfsoccer94

Just How Bad Can It Be?

2009-07-01T14:47:00.003+02:00

A new twist seems to have come up in the "phoney" war with clan Dodo. It would appear that the so-called leader of this (reducing) band of journeymen - PoPo - is using his position in the wonderful game of Power Soccer to launch personal attacks on our fantastic band of witty writers.

Or that is how it seemed when I logged into the site this morning....

Is this a new tactic? Should we be worried?

Do we even care???

Are dodos a clan?

2009-07-01T11:08:00.002+02:00

Well, what is a clan? Since we're clanmates, I'll write several words from Heddie's Forum thread:
Clan is a...Group / Team / Power-Soccer Family

A group of Power-Soccer players, who play against eachother, and sometimes against another clan. They have their own website/blog which all the clan members can go to check out the latest news. Everyone helps eachother out and sometimes the low level players can learn alot by practising against some of the high levels players in the clan. They often have clan cups, (if the clan has a member in it's ranks, just like most clans do) and they make a password that only the clan knows so only the clan can join the cup.
It is a great way to learn more, become a better player, have more fun, and make more friends.

And well, there is a clan called "surreal" who claim to be a clan.
Let's check if they are a real clan!
A group of Power-Soccer players. Ok, they are a group of PS players. But are they a team?
And.... the answer is getting complicated here.
Dodos aren' t a team. They are individuals thrown into a bag. They had (or have, nevermind, we are the winners:D) a war with MB. What was their activity? JUst pperplex's Forum threads and posts. Their blog is dead isn't it? 3 posts and the latest is from May 2009. phew. Is it a team?
No! It's not. Moreover, now they are doing nothing.

Surreal boys, remember! One single dodo won't lay an egg!

It's True, It's True.

2009-06-30T21:25:00.007+02:00

When I was first mad an admin I heard a phrase from our beloved Sipwell. "Brits are Lobsters".
Me being me thought of this in a literal sense, (with my 2 claws snipping away. So I approach
Sipwell and ask him why do you call us Brits "Lobsters"? He replies "Because the British just go
red in the summer they don't go brown like the continentals!!"

I sat there thinking to myself looking at my own skin thinking "we do go brown." Then it happened!
Summer came, beautiful sunshine and BBQ weather. I was sitting in my Girlfriends Mum's back garden applying sun cream to my face and arms etc.. drinking away and a few hours passed. I get up to go in the house and I look in the mirror and all I can think of is "I look like a flaming Lobster". So I thought so all Brits go a nice shade of bright Red? So I browsed the web looking for traditional British tans and here are the unfortunate results :(

1) This is "I Have Been Out For Too Long" Tan

2) Can You Tell I Normally Where Shorts!!!

3) This is the "I Used Fake Tan" Look. (This happens to be popular with the 13-20 yrs old in the UK)

These are the most common tans in the UK. I will not show you my tan as I tend to break the camera. (I don't know why????) So here is how the picture would have looked :D

Have a great summer, and thanks for having me back.

Surreal: the Story of the Drama Queen

2009-06-30T13:34:00.001+02:00

We have to agree that Surreal likes words ending on “o” and come with twice the same letters after one another. Not only are they dodo, they also behave like a yoyo. A couple of weeks ago they were what reasonable people would call “growing in numbers” - I personally stick to filling an empty store with empty boxes – and were playing a reasonable number of Clan Cups (winning from nobody clans with ridiculous quantities of RP). They had brought together a bunch of respectable people, out of which the Dutch Shadow pperplex probably was the most illustrious. At least he stood for something and he reacted to our numerous blog posts and the like. That is, as far as I can say, the only reaction I have seen from Dodo.
But now, again, they start to lose members. People flock out in search for better havens (which in case of Surreal isn’t hard as the clan is rock bottom already so every change is an improvement) and more ambiance. There is no fun in a dead clan. Some of us already understood that quite early on, others – apparently – wanted to test this thesis personally. And with great success, so it seems. And then we are back where we started, aren’t we? Dodo as a yoyo.
They started of with many people, fell asleep. They were woken up by our ‘cry’, collected many people (under the auspices of ‘what’s-his-name’), fell asleep. They brought together a new band of people who wanted to have nothing in common (pperplex was Chief of Staff) and fell asleep. How many times will this story repeat itself? How many times do we have to witness the near-spastic hyperactivity and the “Sleeping Beauty” behaviour (Beauty is a huge exaggeration but I needed that metaphor) that followed ensued?
I like a bit of drama once in a while, as long as it stops on its peak. We have reached it.

PS. As Surreal likes the repetitive letters a lot, why don't we call Powdersnow PoPo or PowPow from now on? hmmm?

Billy Mays Yup

2009-06-29T23:33:00.002+02:00

Sure this is how he would have wanted to be remembered too Henry.

Yes..."better" Part 2

2009-06-29T03:53:00.003+02:00

It seems as though SURREAL is having its tough times these days. In addition to the loss of pperplex, it is now announced that the former co-captain soccerstar1985 is leaving as well.
There are also subliminal messages being left suggesting the collapse of SURREAL. Is this true? See for yourself in the screen shot. Yes, it is true.

-Mfsoccer94

RIP Michael Jackson

2009-06-28T03:00:00.001+02:00

I'm sure this is how he'd like to be remembered...

Yes..."better"

2009-06-27T22:35:00.002+02:00

Since the last two motnhs, another epic battle started in PowerSoccerland, between Dodos and MB.
We have been fighting a lot, cups, blogs, more cups, some other cups, some other members that fight alone, and many other ways...that I won't tell you about

Lately, we have been suffering with applications (tons of them), recruiting the best seeds for the clan, having fun by playing a chess game, and having such a big lost, as bladesman1 was...

But after losing some people in the battlefield, a big sun showed up, and prepared as a big BBQ, with a main plate that will make your stomach a black hole:

SURREAL IS LOSING MEMBERS!!!!

Yes! Is true! The "best clan", the one that had one of the biggest rps ever is starting to notice that his members are unconfortable there, and started making combos to enter, for example:

Join us and win a free League Ticket! - Pow

Enter now and you will get a hamburger!

Enter now and...mmm...hrmm...join us!

Since this campaigns weren't usefull at all, members like Pperplex (ex- #1) and Kingextreme (only Chinese admin) decided to say good bye.

Oh Surreal...how you dare to compare with us! While we are getting better members, you lose them! Muahahaha

MB RULE!

How good I really am - part 2

2009-06-26T01:38:00.005+02:00

You may remember me blogging about 'how good i really am' a while ago. I showed that I was good enough to get an invitation to Alexander the Great, not once but twice, and that I managed to trash the then 24th in the world dagriggstar in something much, much more important than goals, which is possesion.

Well, same old for me. Here's another 2 examples proving how good I really am.

Example 1 - SURREAL Invitation

Yes, that's right, our enemy clan SURREAL invited me. I thought about going into the clan and breaking them to pieces from the inside- what do you think? Sure, I still have to be accepted if I decide to apply but why wouldn't they want a player as good as me? If i get in, I'll convince them quite the opposite of me - how bad they really are.

Example 2 - Admin's Cup
There seemed to be some weird bug that didn't show you the points of the cup and there were 2 people tied for 1st, but don't worry, I'll be sure to crack onto Pow with that one :P. As you can see from the picture, my sublime playing skills put me above airfix_9, shank05, el.nino9, alvcat and may other who had many more rank points than me.

It's amazing how you can see how good you really are, just by taking a look inside of you.

Now, who thinks I should break down SURREAL from the inside?

Snow-Melting Controls

2009-06-23T15:53:00.000+02:00

Step 4: Selecting a Control System

In today’s resource-conscious market, energy efficiency is paramount. Given that a snow-melting system will consume considerable energy while operating, it is important to only operate when snow or ice buildup is a risk.

This is one of the primary advantages that an electric snow-melting system has over a hydronic (hot water or glycol) system. Thermal fluid systems must run, to some degree, even when snow is not present, so as to ensure that the fluid does not freeze, whereas electric systems only need to be active when conditions call for heat.

The recommended control scheme is to have a snow-sensor work in series with a slab-sensing thermostat. Thus the snow-sensor activates the system at the first sign of cold weather in conjunction with precipitation, so that the slab begins to warm up to a temperature appropriate temperature for melting snow (typically 5-8 degrees Celsius). At this point the slab thermostat will deactivate the system, cycling on and off to maintain the melting point until the snow-sensor-controller has determined that the precipitation event has finished.

Do you understand me?

2009-06-18T14:19:00.004+02:00

This clan is diverse in many ways but none more so than in the languages that we speak, indeed half of us do not have English as our first language (in Sipwell's case, none of us are really sure what is his first language). Marx Brothers has always sought to be inclusive in its ethos and there is a case for saying that us English-speakers should probably not have it all our own way.

So, I have been working on a compromise.

It is important that one central language be maintained so that it is easier to understand each other and I gave myself a choice between two main contenders - plain ol' English or some European language. In the end, I plumped for English but, in order to help our non-English brothers, some spelling differences will be implemented. This will be done by stages, so that we can evolve over a period. I envisage each stage being implemented monthly.

Here is the plan:~

In the first month, the letter S will replace the ‘soft’ C. Sertainly this will make the Sentral Europeans jump with joy. The ‘hard’ C will be dropped in favour of K and CH will be replased by J. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.

I expekt growing klan enthusiasm in the sekond month, when the troublesome PH is replased with the F. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the third month, klan akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reaj the stage where more komplikated janges are possible. The klan wil enkourage the removal of double leters, whij have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the ‘silent’ E in the languag is disgrasful. By the fourth month, pepl wil be reseptiv to steps suj as replasing TH with Z and W with V.

During ze fifz monz ze unesesary O kan b droped from vords kontaning OU. Similar janges vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz monz, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to underztand ech ozer.

Zere yu go. Ezi!!

A Brief Ponderance

2009-06-17T14:08:00.001+02:00

In these times of strife, war, and global "economic downturns", it often helps those who may feel lost or slighted by the world or fate to have a nice positive thought to help keep them focused on what they really need to do next in their life. What path to take when the road forks, and it appears that a left leads directly into Hell, and right is merely the "scenic bypass" to the same destination. I am one of those people who may find myself uncertain at times as to what should be my main priority, my next target for completion in my never-ending "to-do list."

When faced with time of trouble, many turn to music, many turn to wine, others just turn insane. Well my friends, I have solved the massive riddle that is this trying situation for manhy out there these days. Yes, when trouble hits, and prospects look bleak, and I am required to muster up the courage to make a decision (no matter how life altering), I remember to always live by the simple acronym WWSD. Yes, I know it will trouble many, and it severely troubles (and scares) me too, but surely the safest path will be followed when you consider...

What Would Sipwell Do?

A Treatise on Treaties, or V = MB²

2009-06-13T20:50:00.007+02:00

This war we're in has involved many casualties, especially on the Surreal side. Did I say "casualties"? I meant "casual ties", in reference to our adversaries', shall we say, fluid membership policies. I speak from experience, having ever-so-briefly stumbled to the dark side, only to see sense and immediately run to the warm bosom of the "even darker" side.

Nevertheless, our struggle with Surreal has a lot in common with other historical clashes between titanic figures. Firstly, nobody really knows how it started. Secondly, it has lasted far longer than anticipated. Well, okay, everybody knows how it started, and nobody made any prediction about its length, but please bear with me for narrative purposes.

On the matter of instigation, I would like to offer an explanation (or a stunning piece of revisionist history, depending how you interpret what follows). Some have claimed that one of our Elders referred to Surreal as the "Dodo" clan. This is not the case, and never happened! In fact, General Sipwell meant no offense, and (permission to speak freely sir?) is at worst, guilty of a somewhat sloppy mischaracterization of early 20th century art.

Above is an example of dadaist art (or is it surrealist? or dodoist? for god's sake, i'm an engineer not an art historian). What my colleague meant to type was that Surreal is a Dada clan, however he was using a Belgian keyboard which we all know has reversed A and O. While surrealism and dadaism are not, strictly speaking, identical, it is an honest mistake. But the Surreal camp, having read these missives, leapt to the offensive and declared war without first asking for clarification! The tragedy is almost Shakespearean.

Their initial blog offensive utilized the strategy of "Schlock and Uhhh?", whereby they attempted to catch us off-guard with a sustained and almost incredible absence of activity. Even to this day, the lack of blogging continues, and it is a testament to our strength that we have weathered the non-storm and emerged, unscathed.

Which brings me to the second point (yes, I had points cleverly hidden between all these digressions; you can scroll up to find them), that the war has lasted too long. Throughout the ages, leaders have promised speedy conflict resolution (the classic "Home for Christmas" refrain trotted out by leaders in europe in 1914 and 1939, southeast asia throughout the 1950s, 60s, and 70s, and Mesopotamia in the 90s and 2003 comes to mind), only to deliver an endless river of blood. In this age of ICBMs (Inter-Continental Brothers Marx), war, if escalated, can be deadly and casual ties will quickly be dissolved.

I, jimmykilcoo, as the newest member of the Anti-Anti-Marx Brothers, call for all parties (Dadas and dodos included!) to lay down their arms. We need to come together, so that we can fabricate a bigger, better enemy. We will teach you how to blog (hint: it involves coming up with ideas, placing the fingers on a preferably non-Belgian keyboard, and transmitting said ideas to others).

If you, Surreal, refuse my completely reasonable and completely non-authorized-by-MB-Cabinet offering of peace, I am prepared to unveil a recently developed weapon which is sure to bring a swift closing to the conflict and establish MB as the all-mighty chief of clans that everyone already knew we were anyway.

(months pass)

Hello? Surreal? I won't wait for your lack of reply any longer. Behold!

http://twitter.com/youlosesome

I call it "V=MB²", or "Victory = Marx Brothers Micro Blog". Heralding a new era of intensified laziness. Our tweets will be the end of you.

MB Moves into the "Great White North"

2009-06-12T15:02:00.009+02:00

Well, so it happens that quality Marx Bretheren come from all places, I mean, we have Estonia, Wales, Ireland, Malta, and yes, we even have Belgium and England covered. But in our great search, we had been shunning one area (mainly due to our bad impressions left by ac--dc), we had ignored the great white expanse known as Canada (previously referred to in this blog as America's Hat). Well now, ladies and gentlemen, we have some hair to go under that cap, as we have added a noteworthy user (and CA) from Canada to the fold. Jimmykilcoo is the latest member on board the "crazy train" we all know as MB.

You may ask how does a Canadian get into soccer? Isn't that hockey country? Well, Jimmykilcoo is from Toronto, and, well, they have had some "troubles" with hockey of late. It seems that in one game, their goaltender was able to stop only one shot, and in a later game was unable to stop anything the opponents threw at him.

This frustrated Jimmy, and led to him getting his own custom-made leafs jersey (and even contemplating a change in allegiance to the Flyers with a new cap), but after realizing that Philly was the source of the blight known as Eric Lindros, he reconsidered the Flyers thing. Later, after seeing one famously dedicated Leafs fan waiting on his lawn for the Stanley Cup to come to Toronto, he decided maybe it was a change in sport, rather than team, that was in order.

This turned out to be not so much better, given the harsh Canadian weather, also, the team couldn't even muster a win against Estonia, which should have been easy. (yes Leedo I know that the game was actually played in Estonia....)

We down here in America (the brains under the hat so to speak) would be very concerned having another very large country at our borders, but fortunately, we have seen these images before....

They assuage our fears everytime....

Finally, we leave you with the pride of Canada (or at least Toronto). The landmark that dominates the skyline. It is visible from miles away in any weather conditions. It causes Canadians to swell with pride (I think that's it anyway). Makes them puff up their chest, to stand tall. The biggest landmark in all of the Ontario province...the CN Tower.

Welcome to the wittiest bunch in PS. Do study the clan history, there will be a quiz by Prof. Sipwell later (probably written by Henry, since that seems to be his strength). If you need a summary, ask Swedeswede, he seems to have that down pretty well. But only ask NYC if you want the drawn out, looooooong version. (I think I have belittled all of our RAs now.... :P).

Have fun!

Surreal - evil as devil! Winners? Ha!

2009-06-07T13:50:00.007+02:00

Few days ago I had an conversation with one of the respected member of Surreal kingextreme. Him and I discussed of who is bad and whos good! And well, there was no arguement over that, we both understood that since the evil devil red powdersnow started the war, it must be Surreal who is the bad one! We both agreed, War = Evil - Peace - Good. In this case, only peace loving side is MB and since the Surreal start the war it means they are evil!

Now about Surreal who is claiming that they won the war? I mean OMG!!! Only reason for this war was prove that we are the bad - evil?? We never claim to be good, but we arent bad either! We are somewhere in the middle. But, Surreal by starting this war sure show that they are pure evil, they are evil but weak! Once they feel thay cant fight anymore they will claim that they won! By the way an anti-MB pperplex admit that he read MB blog, good statement by radicalguy44(captain of CSXI) "Wait...wait.... so YOU read MBs blog???? Why? :P If you are really Anti-MB; why do you read their blog? :P"... Seriously, if you read our blog, how can you call yourself an Anti-MB? :)

As far as I can see, there is no real fight back by Surreal, I see only the poor clan captain who claims to be Anti-MB(he really isnt, see above why) and his puppy from Australia(soccerstar1985) trying something, but it doesnt look like a fighting back, more like screaming for help! They are losing their power and dont wanna fight nor give up, they know they cant win, but yet they name Surreal as a winner already... Thats a sign of desperate, they have lost control whats going on...

One last thing, IF YOU DARE TO START A WAR, TAKE A DEFEAT AS A MAN! Stop the childishness!

Thanks for reading,
/Leedomargus

Why are we bad?Well answer here.

2009-06-05T15:41:00.007+02:00

Surreal, dodos or what they are called? Nevermind. Wha matters here is that we are having a war.

In my previous post I wrote that We are a bunch of bad guys. This is because sipwell is in our clan.
Sipwell, the pure EVIL!

Ok, surreal tries to be good. I wrote they are good.
This was a rather sarcastic sentence. They are neither good nor bad. They are simply grey, simple, normal. (and we are bad but awesome)
But they wanted a war (so they have). And I bet it's high time I revealed why they wanted it.

The first thing is that Sipwell is a bug. A very significant and a real bug created by crew itself. On the other hand we all love this bug and consider him a normal thing especially that he is our godfather.

The problem concerning sipwell is that the bug is a perfect bug. It's unfixable. And powdersnow and pperplex have been trying to locate this bug and fix it for ages but they still can't.

They know that it's impossible but they are still trying:P

Well on the other hand, sipwell is alive and dodos are extinct:D

Keep trying, you will never beat MB and sipwell. Sipwell is also powered withtwo nice kitten (one gives out twiglets and another one spies in Linköping)
Moreover we have a great leeder in here.
You have lost surreal but you don't know about it yet^^

Some greenhorn's thoughts

2009-06-01T15:09:00.006+02:00

Well, some of you know me whereas some others may have not even heard the fact that me, 0tomek0 was appointed a new MB member.
I decided to join the clan since I felt you all are a bunch of great friends and simply the best clan, what else should I say:P

I have to mention that one of the first things gaston, our argentinian captain told me was that "you have to remember that Surreal is bad". Well since my brain exists (it's tiny though but nevermind) I started thinking. Surreal is bad? Why the hell. To cut the long story short, I have to say that Surreal is good!
Surreal is good and WE, the MBs are bad. Why? The answer s very very easy. We have SIPWELL!

Well coming back, when I entered our awesome clan, I recalled myself a song by gunsnroses titled (you won't guess) of course "welcome to the jungle". Title itself is idel for that kind of days.
But the lyrics itself? Even better. Let me write some lines here:)

Welcome to the jungle, we've got funny games, we've got everything you want...

Sounds great, doesn't it?
On the other hand, several lines later there is: "You know where you are?! You are in the jungle baby, YOU ARE GONNA DIE!"

But then I recalled myself another song, by Monty Phyton, where they sing
"Always look on the bright side of death"
That is a little better, isn't it?
Whoops! Bright=good
Have I just written that we should think in the surreal way?

Well but we are the dark side!

We should recruit new members with the image above the post:)
We have some twiglets to give out:D

Does coincidence exist?

2009-05-28T17:11:00.007+02:00

Once in a while you run into a situation you think "nahhh, this is not possible!"
To be honest, I do not believe in destiny. Situations occur randomly and are merely collision of events. Not controlled, let alone planned.

But at times, you start to doubt your own beliefs. You start to think there just might be a "Great Force" who, now or then, gives you a sign to underline the things that matter most.

Believe it or not guys, I had such an experience and it happened to me yesterday. There has been a "war" between MB and Surreal (has been I guess because all seems already quiet now) and we called them a Dodo-clan. Oh well, you know about all that if you read this blog now and then.

Now let me tell you about yesterday evening. It was almost midnight and I watched the Champions League final. Due to the victory of Barceloa (BARCA BARCA BARCA!!!!) I treated myself on an extra glass of good wine (well to be honest the glass became a bottle...).

After the game I came online an read the blog about Blade leaving us. So it seemed a good idea to write a comment on that blog and so I did. Now, you all know you have to be logged in to write a comment and, to verify the post is intended, you have to copy a word. And so did I. But what word did I have to write down....

So I ask you...is this a sign of a "Great Force" or is this just a matter of coincidence?

Goodbye Marx Brothers, Thankyou

2009-05-27T21:19:00.002+02:00

I have been in MB for 1 week, in that week I have felt very welcome and touched by all members (Not in that way). Every single member of this amazing clan is approachable and friendly.
Joining The Marx Brothers was a great honour for me as I did not see myself as MB material. (To be honest I am not funny).

The reason I have chosen to leave MB has nothing to do with the clan itself, it is more to do with my previous clan. Lately they have gone through troubles and I hold myself partly to blame. I think me going back to them and help them rebuild into the clan that everyone respects and looks to its users as a good example of what PS is all about. (Similar to MB but win more).

I would like to say thank you to all members, especially Sip who invited me, Gentle who suggested me, that Irish guy who is a very close friend, AF9 who gives out twiglets to all, NYC with a very warm welcome and Gaston who is really great guy who helps anybody.

Goodluck MB, May you take down anyone who stands in your way.

My Take On The MB vs Surreal

2009-05-21T19:07:00.005+02:00

I would like to start my first blog by saying a thankyou to TVST. I know me leaving was a shock, and believe me my intentions were sincere. ATVST and TVST are a major reason as to why I love this game so much and I owe them everything, but I wanted a new start, and with MB I believe I can have that.

Anyway back to writing my first post. For the last week or so I have been watching the MB vs Surreal war kick off and from a neutral position it was great reading. (Well only 1 clan was really writing). Obviously now I am in MB it seems I have picked which side I am on. Reading the posts from Sipwell and the rest of the clan I can see this so called war going only to MB.

My reasons for this is simple. Evolution has dictated that to survive in this ever-changing world we need to be able to adapt,the so called "Survival of the fittest approach". The Dodo, ceased to exist as nature declared it unfit, so it died.Unlike the Dodo Surreal have come back into existence. There was a user called Rodry2 who declared in the forums that and i quote
"Surreal are not dead". A week or so later Rodry2 wrote a post in the forums called "I Quit". Which when you think about it it is rather funny after he spent all that time recruiting members to joint then he decides to quit. So it seems already Surreal are flaking away
like a piece of bad skin.

I say this to all followers of MB, Put on your hunting caps, pick your weapon of choice, groom your horses and fetch the hounds, because as of today it is officially Dodo hunting season. The best thing about this hunting season is that, because nature decided that a Dodo is not supposed to exist, the season never closes.

HAPPY HUNTING

The Quality went up again: New Member -- Bladesman1

2009-05-21T16:50:00.001+02:00

As all of you know, we deeply respect TVST. Not only do they have a very artistic name – The Varsity Striking Targeters – they also have a whole series of players who are nothing more than the “crème de la crème” of Powersoccer. If I ever were to join a competitive clan, it would be TVST for sure. They exemplify what some of us find important in life, great friendship combined with a competitive team spirit: if they cannot be the best, then at least almost near the best.

Why am I writing this introduction to one of my blog posts. Simply because I want to massage away some anger that might erupt about a Marx Brothers decision. We recently saw that a certain user, bladesman1, was clan-less although he was one of the center pieces of TVST. That simply was a window of opportunity I could not walk past. And I didn’t.

Bladesman1 is without doubt one of the finest, the wittiest and the most respected users in Powersoccer. He was nurtured and raised in TVST but decided, like many top football players actually, that it was time to sniff some fresh air. He didn’t leave TVST because he was bored there or felt at unease. He left because he felt he had to and was surprised he got an invitation (some time after he left) from the Marx Brothers.

How could we resist NOT to invite this Heir of British Comedy, this Prince of Wit? How could we decide AGAINST accepting this multi-talented Baron of Extraordinary Behaviour? How could we EXCLUDE this Duke of Sportmanship?

We couldn’t and we didn’t. Marx Brothers was founded to bring fun into the game of Powersoccer, to astonish and surprise people day in day out. Marx Brothers was founded to show to users that there is more in life than winning games and being the best. Clan ranking, individual Ranking or Number One Places are not what we need… We stand for quality, we stand for words, we stand for fun. If our latest Marx Brother cannot bring that, then nobody can.

At our TVST brothers we say: don’t be angry, don’t be mad. We consider you to be a clan that above all goes for Ranking Points and excels in that. Wit, humour and fun is not your core business, but a dish on the side. Bladesman1 decided to make wit, fun and humour his personal core business, therefore Marx Brothers is were he found his second home.

Lies, damned lies and … Surreal Updates.

2009-05-20T12:01:00.001+02:00

(I am back to warfare business... after two days of absence... for those of you who thought the war is over... think again)

As always in times of warfare, the opposing parties will always try to throw with mud (or a brick in mud) to the other side. They will fabricate lies and damned lies to support their case. In World War I, the Germans were accused of raping all Belgian women and killing all Belgian babies with bajonets and butchers’ knifes; the French were notable for their man-eating endeavours and the British were noteworthy for their disgusting habit of drinking tea at most impossible hours. Every war has its lies, its fabrications and its wrong interpretations of actual facts, the war with Surreal is no different. The only difference is that we stay within the boundaries of reality. Granted, we can exaggerate a bit or rewrite some elements, but in essence: all what we write is true and supported by evidence…
Apparently the other side in this war is not interested in the truth that much, especially when it is not on their side. They want to make their story come across and the more exaggeration they can use, the more they will. They have made three preposterous claims in a varied formats:
1) Marx Brothers started the war.
2) Marx Brothers made Vkultras leave Surreal
3) Marx Brothers made the merger between TVST and Surreal collapse

Basically none of the claims made has any valid ground. They all are fabrications of the worst kind and they seem to be the only ones believing them.
We never started the war. I wrote an observation on this blog as I was quite surprised that I, as wispell, got invited to Surreal although I did not fulfil any of the necessary requirements. I was no legend (at least not on Wispell), I was no level 75 + and I was no owner of 1850 + RP. That made me wonder: how come I got an invitation? What is wrong with Surreal? As it turned out, there was a lot wrong. They didn’t live up to their own (high) expectations and they never became "a clan that LEADS, while others follow” nor “a clan consisting of skilled and experienced players , and our objective will be to become the top ranked clan” to quote their own page. So I wrote an assessment based on the information I saw: number of clan cups played, number of members added, number of guest book entries and content of those entries. A clan that leads, rather than be led? With users nobody heard of? Isn’t that claim absurd?
Apparently that critical assessment wasn’t well received in Dodo Clan and they attacked us by creating an anti-MB movement and calling themselves an anti-MB clan. Who started the war then? Did we challenge them to a war? Since when is it not allowed to write blog entries on other clans? In Dutch we have this expression (translated): they have long toes… which means that it is very easy to step on the soul of them. The question with Surreal is: aren’t they anything but toes?

Vkultras decided to leave Surreal himself (and accepted an invitation from TVST shortly after that). We never forced him too. He took the decision himself as he did not fulfil any of the requirements of Surreal. It takes a great man to acknowledge and to see that. In truth, he didn’t fulfil any of the requirements. You cannot blame us for pointing that out. He left, in our view, through the front gate but he got a portrayal as a 7 year old martyr on the Surreal Blog. He himself didn’t seem to be very happy about that move, as can be read as a reply on that article. As I have heard: he is more at ease, more happy with TVST. That is understandable: TVST is, to use the words of Surreal clan page again, “a clan with nice internal atmosphere so we all enjoy ourselves”. It is a clan with an identity, with people who can make fun and who know how to enjoy themselves.

The merger with TVST was, in our view, a very bad idea to be launched. As said earlier, TVST is a steamrolling clan with a high speed locomotive: merging or developing friendly relations with Surreal (what does that last bit mean essentially?) would slow the machine down and perhaps the internal strive would lead to a split in ranks. Luckily it never got that far as many TVST members opposed to the merger anyways. What role did Marx Brothers play in this story? None whatsoever. Clear thinking as TVST are, they made up their mind themselves. It is asinine of Surreal and Powdersnow to suggest that TVST are so ‘dumb’ that they would let themselves guide by what we, as a third party, think or say. Is that the basis of respect between the two clans? Implicitly calling the other ones “coward”, “without a mind of their own”, and “being led like sheep or chicken”: is that the ideal foundation of a friendship? I don’t think so.

Sipwell?

2009-05-19T23:08:00.001+02:00

Soon to be Dinosaurs?

2009-05-19T02:29:00.003+02:00

It’s official now. The self proclaimed enemies of the institute of the finest and wittiest in Power Soccer, you call it Marx Brothers, have “officially” declared themselves Anti-IOTFAWIPS(MB). A question I pose to the entire clan of surrealists is what has changed? You have added Anti-MB (Incorrect by the way, should be IOTFAWIPS) to your club member badges but what else? As far as I can tell or am concerned nothing else.

Why did you do it? Well there could be millions of reasons but I can say the main one, powdersnow told you too be, or taught you to agree. He showed you his side of the story and nothing else in the hope of convincing you to join him, or perhaps he just said do it or leave. Whatever the case it was ultimately pow’s decision. He has the power to sway minds, which is great. But here is the thing, here in IOTFAWIPS we are all influential masterminds. What we say can be spread everywhere. The forums, the dev blog, the gamerooms, the dashboard you name it we are there. Surreal has great users no doubt, but they do not have the power we have. We have the power!

There is so much power that normal users would probably go crazy trying to do only good with it. So we make our clan hard to join, we don’t let those that listen to posters telling them what to do. No! We make sure that only the finest and wittiest get in. Not because we strive to be the best, but because we must protect such grave power we have.

Now it comes to powdersnow this founder of yours that appears to be a strong believer in no Marx Brothers. But care to recall our birthday a while back, and see what pow had to say about us:

Let’s start with the obvious, MB is not an ordinary clan and doesn’t consist of ordinary people… they are all incredibly verbal and witty…everything they write worth reading…MB adds something vital to the Power Soccer community…I wish I had some of that attitude towards some stuff in my life…adds flavour to our community…If I could put something on my wish list for 2009, it would be to get more clans like MB.. Thank you MB. Congrats!
//Pow

Under what you now see as an imminent doom and hypocrisy will you dodo’s back down and surrender or face the fury of all out blogging that will make you more like a dinosaur than a dodo. It’s up to you Surreal, face up or fall back!

Post 300 on the blog!

Clan Dodo - Latest Merchandise

2009-05-19T00:09:00.001+02:00

Some painstaking research has led to a remarkable discovery!

It would seem that Disney's own Mickey Mouse is the proud owner of....

..... A Powdersnow watch!

Surreal: clan of mercenaries

2009-05-18T13:50:00.004+02:00

The window of opportunity seems to have closed again. Dodo Clanwent uphill in assembling users but that has halted again, only four days after their announcement in the Clan forum of Powersoccer. Some of the people initially recruited, like leijte_8, already turned their back on Dodo Clan. We can understand that reaction: you don’t want to link your name to a dead-end project.
It is rather questionable that you go from 9 to 24 users in just three days… considering that other top clans, like the Colony of the Slippermen or TVST, build up their clan in a timespan of months. Dodo Clan seems to gamble on “easy cash” rather than building up a proper identity based group of people. I would like to see how many members do understand the core values of this clan. Powdersnow probably devoted a considerate amount of time to write the clan principles (on their blog), yet few clan members actually know what Dodo Clan stands for. Rodry2 was perhaps very active in selected in quantity, but the concept of quality, of knowing to whom you belong is something unheard of…

And still! Still! Yesterday Rodry2, former clan co-captain, challenged TVST to a clan cup. TVST, a house of people scoring high on sportsmanship, obviously accepted. It turned out that only 1 clan member of Surreal came to the actual game… the great sportsman Pperplex of whom we are still wondering what on earth he is doing in Dodo Clan. It sounds like a Suicide Mission the Japanese World War II kamikazes would consider being a bit extravagant... does it not?
How did it proceed? Dodo Clan hired two mercenaries, Khizarasd and bolivian_power, to participate in the cup. They joined and left again after the games. That is in our view a very dubious strategy, moreover since Surreal played a clan cup against the one man clan of bolivian_power and won.

What do we have then? A clan with no philosophy, of whom 85 % of the members have no clue who they are or what they do in Dodo Clan– apart from warming themselves to the hot upper-Dodo Powdersnow (in many respects) – and who use non-members to get some easy RP. Can't we come to the conclusion that Surreal is nothing more than a band of mercenaries, all there for their own reasons - perceived importance, as they are close to Powdersnow, ... - but none because they believe in the philosophical and communal underpinnings of Dodo Clan?
The claim I made in the first post, over a week ago, still stands: Dodo Clan was perhaps a clan with potential, but they never ever lived up to the standards they set themselves.

Our answer is simple: pull the plug and let the comatose patient die in peace. We will cherish our good recollections of Dodo Clan and supplant our bad ones… There is life after Dodo Clan and if it continues like this... we will be able to put this thesis to the test fairly soon.

MB vs. SURREAL Clan Cup Delight

2009-05-17T17:00:00.004+02:00

Now we all know that SURREAL has some highly ranked users, such as pperplex, 1kaka, stigba, the retired redcard87, and others. But can those highly ranked users really compete against our experienced and respected Marx Brothers?

Yesterday, May 16, 2009 this was put to the test. A 2 vs. 2 clan cup (Marx Brothers vs. SURREAL) was played. Playing beside myself for the Marx Brothers was adeidos and playing for the dodos was soccerstar1985 and richard44. Did you expect SURREAL to dominate the Marx Brothers?

The first match played was mfsoccer94 vs. soccerstar1995. The match started with a early goal from mfsoccer94 to lead by one. A few minutes later, soccerstar1995 came back to score the equalizer. At that moment, the disconnection sign popped up and immediately soccerstar1995 had wrote on the cup chat that his browser froze. Soccerstar1995 ended up quitting the match, and mfsoccer94 won. The other match being played at the same time was adeidos vs. richard44. The match ended in a close game, adeidos 0, richard44 1. After the first round, Marx Brothers 3, SURREAL 3.

The second round had begun. It was mfsoccer94 vs. richard44. I don't remember the exact score of the match, but mfsoccer94 had won. I believe it was 3-1. Fighting to help me out was adeidos vs. soccerstar1995. Adeidos tried his best but fell to soccerstar1995. But at that moment, nothing else mattered.

The Marx Brothers had beaten SURREAL! The most valuable player was mfsoccer94. See the picture for proof, and watch as you are amazed. I thought SURREAL was supposed to better at the game and Marx Brothers better at blogging? I guess not. The outcome shows the Marx Brothers better at both.

Signing out, mfsoccer94.

On bandwagoning and excellence

2009-05-17T15:22:00.001+02:00

It seems Dodo Clan is trying a new tactic: first, they are courting TVST. We will reply and add two things.

First, courting TVST. We actually interpret that as a positive sign. Dodo Clan did not pick one of the nobody clans to merge or develop friendly relations with, as we might have expected (judging on the new members of that clan). They selected one of the finest, one of the most talented and one of the core clans of Powersoccer. TVST simply is a bunch of heroes, a troop of superb and extremely respected players with each individual member having more talents than the whole of the Dodo Clan together. Their new blog is perhaps one of the best I have seen and the articles they published so far suggest that good times are coming. You wouldn’t be surprised as they have talented writers like Kissenbarden, bladesman1 and aly38 to name but a few. Apart from that, they have many top players in their ranks… players that would beat the Dodo Clan Rattle every game every time. Marx Brothers and TVST have different aims in life, but if there is one clan we appreciate a lot in this game, it is TVST without doubt.
It is therefore no surprise that Dodo Clan wanted to attach their slow, heavy and basically useless wagon to the high-speed TVST locomotive. Dodo Clan accuses us of blocking the merger with TVST. Many TVST clan members – whom I and all of us consider to be friends – told me that was not really the case. They believed they had a steamrolling clan and didn’t see any advantage, apart from Powdersnow himself, in joining with Dodo Clan. You can’t blame them, can you?

How can we respond to this. Well, quite easily. We have linked the new TVST blog to our list of friends and we expect and ask every reader of our blog to have a look there too. It is worth the effort for sure, for the reasons we mentioned above. Rather different than the Dodo clan, they have talented writers. It would be a shame not to grant them this honour.

What have we seen so far from Dodo Clan in response to our fair and balanced blog posts? Nothing but hatred, rant at times and texts with more spelling mistakes than a millipede has feet. How did we fight this war? With good written blog articles – including some top class poetry – and by times hilarious images, videos and something special coming in the next days. Marx Brothers is an artistic clan. We devote a lot of time and energy to come up with original, and unheard of expressions. Marx Brothers aims at perfection and all its articles are scrutinized by a special board… As all of our members easily could pass the Arts classes, there is not that much correction necessary but the simple fact that we do have it means we are serious about our endeavours.

Mrs. Sipwell decided to throw in all of her talents in this battle as well, as she thought it was worth fighting. Here is her contribution… something unique (and copyright protected). Dodo Clan does not have artistic designers in its midst, do they (the question could be: what does Dodo Clan have in its midst?)? We fight battles high in the sky, as Mrs. Sipwell exemplifies:

Hard to beat in excellence, is it not?

The new Legends of Surreal

2009-05-16T19:18:00.000+02:00

It seems like Dodo Clan found some “fools” willing to join them. Of course, rather than having people flock to them because they are outstanding, remarkable, high in clan ranking or another positive feature, Dodo Clan is flocking to the people by sending invitations, using forum posts and the like.
It would be rather odd to see a top team like Manchester United write on a public forum or in a newspaper: “Hi everybody. If you think you are fit to play in our team. Please send us a message.” That sounds like something for Luton Town, the lowest rank team in Britain, to do. If you browse through the pages of the “clan announcements” in the Powersoccer forum, you will see that none of the clans that matter publish there. They can pick any player they want and ask them to join, as has been the tradition of Marx Brothers and many other absolute top clans in the past. Not Surreal though: they publish an announcement that they are looking for players.
Their new co-captain, rodry2, on which we will dwell a bit more later on, posted the following intruiging message: “Surreal search for new members so everybody have chance to join BUT you need : Rating above 1850, Level above 75, Sportsmanship stars 2,5 minimum.When you have that contact powdersnow, 1champion1,or stigba well if nobody online wrote message in clan guestbook,gl in reaching requierd reqeriments!!See you in game.”

What do we read here: 1) everybody has a chance to join; 2) your sportsmanship stars should be 2,5 minimum.
Wait a minute! What did the Surreal blog say again? Let’s update ourselves: •
- You are level 99
- You are a former nr 1
- You are a legend (meaning member for at least two years, but you also need to be good…)
- current league champions from one of the seven leagues has a good chance of being admitted
- other possible reasons, but you need to make a REAL strong case for yourself

You have to be an absolute Powersoccer hero. Pperplex is one and probably Vkultras, who was brutally attacked on the Surreal Blog and compared to a helpless even moron-like kid, is one in the making. But all the new members? Who on earth are they? What is their “star quality”?

First I am going to give the latest additions to the clan:
Lejte8
Swen155
Kij_1983
Power24

They all might be nice chaps and probably good additions but who on earth are they? Can the person who knows who these “legends” are come forward please? Can anybody judge the star quality of these people? Anyone?

A final word to the new co-captain of Surreal. His name is rodry2. He is…

Who is he? Is he a secret star? One of those stars at the other side of reality (so we failed to notice him). Let’s dig a bit in the forum to find out who he really is.

First apparently he was part of the FC Shadows Youth Academy. At least, that is what we thought he was. It seems, according to the reaction of that other user, that he was copying a name in order to give himself a certain importance under the idea: “if we can’t create our own identity, let’s pick somebody elses.”
That same day – that same day! – he announced in the forum that he was looking for a clan. Then we lose track of him until the 16th of April where he again announces he is looking for a clan. Clanhopper, anyone?
Then he created or recreated the clan “The Elements” – to be pointed out by the former owner he got his historical record wrong and he left that clan to found the “Beatles” some days later…

And on Tuesday he became member of Surreal and two days later he was made co-captain.

Well… it is either me or their definition of “legends” really is lame. You are a legend if…
(please fill in yourself)

Let there be fun everywhere!

2009-05-15T15:17:00.001+02:00

People who know me say I am a decent and nice guy. A bit weird sometimes, I won’t deny that at all but certainly friendly and helpful. So I offered my help to Surreal. I actually posted a message in their GB saying:

Written by gentle_man_: 14/05/2009 16:18
Hey guys, I don't feel that comfortable with a war between clans. Is that really necessary?

You might be anti-MB, me personally I am not anti-Surreal. I think you are a great clan with a lot of possibilities. And as I understand, you are looking for good/representative players. Would love to help you out here.

(The message is already removed by the way, god knows why).

After this post newbie Co-Captain Rodry came to me and asked if I wanted to join them…hmmm did I wrote that? No I didn't but I'll get to that a bit later. What struck me was: 1) Pow himself didn’t even bother to contact me. For sure I would expect him and not the newbie to contact me. Call me weird – like I said no problem with that - but ey would be nice if I was to be taken seriously please. 2) They exactly did the same thing as they did a few months ago when I left MB for a short period of time due to an argument with AF9.

As you might recall, AF9 was going through a difficult time in her personal life and I was somehow caught up in that struggle. I felt really down and consequently there was no other decision than to leave the clan. Come to think of it…AF9 never apologized for her behaviour. Grmpf…apparently she felt she didn’t need to but damnit, she should!

Hmmm I am getting off track here. Sorry about that. What I was trying to say: I left MB at that time and only minutes (!) after that, still shocked and sad, I got an invitation to…Surreal…from…Powdersnow.

Well let me make something clear. The “fight” between MB and Surreal is of course a silly one. First of all, a fight implies there are two parties that are more or less equal in strength. Hmmm that is not the case since MB, of course, is no match for Surreal. Furthermore, yes if I can help I will. After all I am a decent guy. But I will NOT join Surreal, no way.

I wrote “And as I understand, you are looking for good/representative players. Would love to help you out here.”. Meaning: I can help find new members for the Surreal clan. Not meaning: I will join Surreal myself.

So, about the helping out stuff, I think I will suggest a new member…I discovered a chap, lvl 23 and rp 1302, he has some disconnections but overall, I think he fits the new profile of the general Surreal member and he will be a good addition to the clan :).

Dear fellow MB-ers, we do not need to “fight”, help Surreal to new members and let’s help them to build their clan. If you see players around matching the new profile like I did, ring their door bell and inform them. Surreal was a grumpy old man grasping for what migh be the last bit of air. Seems the spirit has come back, but they are still grumpy. So present new members and hopefully the fun will come back to their clan as well. Let there be fun everywhere…:)

Kill the Dodo !?!

2009-05-15T13:03:00.002+02:00

This morning I got inside information about how Surreal perceived the “war” with Marx Brothers. It was handed to me by a certain Powdersnow, a man of whom we have no recollection of, let alone a positive image. He must be the number one in that clan of nobodies or the Dodo Clan as we will refer to when speaking of Surreal as he rather grandly spoke of himself in relation to the Dodo Clan.

The information he gave me proved that they seem to have assumed that we wanted to destroy them, which of course is simply not true. If we will retaliate now, it means we are under attack and not vice versa.
The initial blog post said three things: 1) Dodo Clan is not active as they did not participate for over a month in clan cups; 2) Dodo Clan accepts members below their own standards; 3) Dodo Clan Members acknowledge themselves the clan is dead, yet again.

Not one of these observations is incorrect. Painful: most certainly. Harmful: perhaps slightly. Incorrect: absolutely not. You must be either an outright idiot – which they are not at all – or a looking for a cause to attack us… Disgruntled as they are, they chose for the latter option. They seem to have set about to attack the Marx Brothers - and its heritage, its fans and its members - full frontal. If they attack us for the reasons given above, they attack the truth.

The Dodo Clan launched an “anti-MB campaign” – nobody apart from me has noticed it – and they informed the world on their blog that they are not dead. We heard that before, did we not? The following video metaphorically describes what will happen:

The Dodo is one of those species that did not survive evolution. Will Surreal follow suit?